Letters?  I get lots and lots of letters.  Some are nice, some are flames (blasting me), some ask questions, and some are funny (even if the people writing them didn't intend to be).  The ones I share here have either a lesson or a laugh.  The names of the original writers (and any personal information) have been edited to protect their privacy online.



Top Step To Hell PDF Print E-mail
Written by Deane W.   
Saturday, 15 April 2006 07:57

In response to this item on the PearlyGates list:

If you get an envelope from a company called the Internal Revenue Service,"DO NOT OPEN IT!

This group operates a scam around this time every year. Their letter claims that you owe them money, which they will take and use to pay for the operation of essential functions of the United States government. This is untrue!

The money the IRS collects is used to fund various inefficient and pointless social engineering projects and favorite pork-barrel projects like studying sneezing and the swimming habits of insects.

This organization has ties to another shady outfit called the Social Security Administration, who claim to take money from your regular paychecks and save it for your retirement. In truth, the SSA uses the money to pay for the same misguided make-work projects the IRS helps mastermind.

These scam artists have bilked honest, hard working Americans out of billions of dollars. Don't be among them!

Simply send that letter back marked, "Return to Sender". If they inquire by phone, please don't use my name; I'm shy and modest about receiving the credit.

Deane W wrote:

Subject: No wonder the church is on the top step to hell.

I read this and wonder if your preaching . . .

Last Updated ( Saturday, 15 April 2006 08:18 )
 
I Hate Jesus PDF Print E-mail
Written by Brenden K.   
Saturday, 15 April 2006 07:47

Brenden wrote:

"Look man I hate Jesus Christ. He is a f***ing g*y b***ard and I never liked him so send me no more emails about the b***ard."

Pastor Tim replied:

"Really? When did you meet him and form this opinion?"

Last Updated ( Saturday, 15 April 2006 08:10 )
 
I have met the most wonderful girl. PDF Print E-mail
Written by Thankful   
Wednesday, 31 August 2005 21:06

Hey Pastor Tim!

How are you?  I just wanted to send you a quick thank you for recomending eHarmony to me several months ago.  I have met the most wonderful girl, her name is (removed for privacy).  I am very supprised at how much we have in common.  If I were to put in a special order to God for the perfect girl I don't think I would have done any better. 

I wouldn't have tried it if you hadn't recomended it, so thank you.

Rev. (removed for privacy)
Last Updated ( Wednesday, 31 August 2005 21:09 )
 
Same Sex Marriage In Canada? PDF Print E-mail
Written by Marlene   
Wednesday, 03 August 2005 10:55

DEAR PASTOR TIM,

WHAT IS YOUR OPINION ON THE REPUBATED ANTI-BIBLICAL BILL THAT WAS PAST TO ALLOW REPUBATES TO MARRY?

MY OPINION IS AS FOLLOWS: I AM THOROUGHLY DISGUSTED WITH CANADA AND THE FACT THAT THE GOVERNMENT PAST SUCH AN EVIL BILL. ANYBODY WITH HALF A BRAIN KNOWS THAT EVEN DOGS KNOW BETTER THAN THESE REPUBATED PEOPLE.

WELL, AS YOU CAN SEE I AM VERY UPSET ABOUT THIS SAME-SEX MARRIAGE LAW. I JUST WISH MORE CHRISTIANS WOULD HAVE SPOKEN UP AND THEN MAYBE GOD WOULD HAVE DONE SOMETHING ABOUT IT. NOW, I FEAR THAT HE WILL AND NOBODY WILL LIKE WHAT HE WILL DO. OH WELL, I GUESS WE ALL KNEW . . .

 
Back Off!!! PDF Print E-mail
Written by Jessica   
Monday, 01 August 2005 18:33

Jessica wrote:

Dear Tim,

I Don't like what your sending me so BACK OFF!!

You are an idoit!!!!

From Jessie

I replied:

Dear Jessica, I've removed you from my lists. BTW, "Idoit" is spelled "idiot". (Thanks for the laugh.) 

Pastor Tim

Pastor Tim
Last Updated ( Saturday, 15 April 2006 08:11 )
 
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