Monthly Archive

2016

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 1323 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
Illustrations
Pastor Tim
2226

Sovereignty and Wisdom of God

A passenger jet was suffering through a severe thunderstorm. As the passengers were being bounced around by the turbulence a young woman turned to a minister sitting next to her and with a nervous la... read more..

One-liners
Pastor Tim
1512

One-liner #1123

"I loathe people who keep dogs; they are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves." - August Strindberg read more..

Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
941

Cybersalt News - September 14, 2016

There is a new FunBlog entry today. You can watch "Tripal Spiral Dominoes" at:www.cybersalt.org/funblog/triple-spiral-dominoes Enjoy the rest of today's mailing! ~ Pastor Tim... read more..

FunBlog
Pastor Tim
1990

Triple Spiral Dominoes

We like watching dominoes falling as much as most average people, but this tripal spiral of 15,000 dominoes sure dialed our enjoyment up a notch! ... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1583

Toy Return

"Hey, where can I find the Terminator action figures?" "Aisle B, back." read more..

Quotes
Pastor Tim
1543

Quote #1570

"Don't bother to give God instructions; just report for duty." - Corrie Ten Boom read more..

Clean Jokes
4121

Listening In

A long time ago, before the days of cell phones, I needed to call home, and the only pay phone I could find was in use. So I stood to the side and politely waited until it was free, thinking it would ... read more..

Illustrations
Pastor Tim
2030

Housecleaning Philosophy

I don't do windows because...I love birds and don't want one to run into a clean window and get hurt. I don't wax floors because...I am terrified a guest will slip and get hurt then I'll feel terribl... read more..

One-liners
Pastor Tim
1427

One-liner #1122

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, and a good woman - or a bad woman; depends on how much happiness you can handle. -George Burns... read more..

Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
895

Cybersalt News - September 13, 2016

Yes, there were no mailings on the weekend and Monday. Since my sabbatical ended I've been *trying* to maintain healthier hours. That and a change in my sermon preparation habits combined to bump thos... read more..

Pearly Gates Jokes
Pastor Tim
3177

Blind Soccer

A teacher at a school for blind kids is taking his school's soccer team to an "away game".  They stop for a rest break, and to let the kids work off some energy with a little impromptu practice i... read more..

God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
1798

Pardon My French, S'il Vous Plaît

When I was young, a saying went around, “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words/names will never hurt me.” Supposedly it was to make me ignore people saying nasty things about me. For the mos... read more..

Illustrations
Pastor Tim
2062

Self Image, Discipline, Dieting

A middle-aged man wasn't feeling well, so he went to the doctor for a check up. After a thorough examination, the doctor said, "Well, based on my examination, the best thing for you is to cut out all... read more..

Clean Jokes
4368

Combination Faith

The temporary Sunday School teacher was struggling to open a combination lock on the supply cabinet. She had been told the combination, but couldn't quite remember it. Finally she went to the pastor'... read more..

Sermons
Pastor Tim
1583

Elephant Killing Wisdom

When we rely on human wisdom and fancy words to try and convert people to following Jesus, we empty the cross of its power. Listen Online: {audio}podcast/sm20160911.mp3{/audio} Pastor Tim refer read more..

Quotes
Pastor Tim
1693

Quote #1569

"Thou hast formed us for Thyself, and our hearts are restless till they find rest in Thee." - Augustine read more..

One-liners
Pastor Tim
1386

One-liner #1121

I am always going the extra mile: because I never stop for directions.... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1337

Say Cheese

If prisons let prisoners take their own mugshots, would they be called cellfies?... read more..

Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
928

Cybersalt News - September 9, 2016

I enjoy people who enjoy their jobs, so I enjoy the people in today's FunBlog entry. You'll find "Knocking Big Rocks Down" at:www.cybersalt.org/funblog/knocking-big-rocks-down Enjoy the rest of today... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1515

Diet Anticipation

I just want to be as thin as my patience.... read more..

One-liners
Pastor Tim
1469

One-liner #1120

I need to get in shape; if I was murdered right now my chalk outline would be a circle.... read more..

Illustrations
Pastor Tim
2243

Harvesting, Frustration

Two farmers were comparing notes on the poor harvest. "Jeb, I'm telling you the wheat was so poor I had to harvest it with scissors." "That's nothing, Grady. I had to lather my field and shave it."... read more..

FunBlog
Pastor Tim
1759

Knocking Big Rocks Down

The guy at the end sums it up the best, "It's fun to knock those bigs rocks down; it's very fun."  ... read more..

Quotes
Pastor Tim
1436

Quote #1568

"Chains do not hold a marriage together.  It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years."   - Simone Signoret read more..

Clean Jokes
4040

Senior "Favorite Things"

There are recent rumors that Julie Andrews did a concert for AARP (The American Association of Retired Persons). Ms. Andrews sang a favorite from the Sound of Music, "Favorite Things". There were a fe... read more..

Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
967

Cybersalt News - September 8, 2016

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! There is a new Funny Picture on the Cybersalt site. Do you know someone who always likes to go bigger in a race? This guy looks like one of those types. Check out "Rubber D... read more..

Illustrations
Pastor Tim
2558

Brighten Your Corner

We cannot all be famous or be listed in "Who's Who",But every person, great or small,has important work to do. For seldom do we realizethe importance of small deeds,Or to what degree of greatnes... read more..

Quotes
Pastor Tim
2049

Quote #1567

"Somewhere, someone else is happy with less than you have." read more..

One-liners
Pastor Tim
1316

One-liner #1119

My goal was to lose 10 pounds this year: only 15 to go!... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1488

Which Way Shouldn't I Go?

Askhole: A person who constantly asks for your advice, yet always does the opposite of what you told them.... read more..