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More Jokes

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    Goober Widow

    A woman brought an old picture of her dead husband, wearing a hat, to the photographer.…
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    Soup Words

    It was a formal banquet. The minister had just finished saying grace when a waiter…
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    Cheap Rhymes With Jeep

    A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for Christmas. A friend of his said, "I…
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    Cough Remedy

    The owner of a drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against the wall. The…
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    Blind Ambition

    Charlie Boswell has always been one of my heroes. He has inspired me and thousands of…
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    Shopping Advice

    While I was shopping in the mall with my three children, a display in the window of a…
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    Harmonica Gift

    Thanks for the harmonica you gave me for Christmas," Little Johnny said to his Uncle…
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    Hurry and Sign Up

    Dear Ma and Pa: I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Army…
  • A boy's perspective

    Johnny and Remembrance

    One Sunday morning the pastor noticed little Johnny was standing staring up at the large…
  • peat moss

    No ID

    A woman went into a hardware store to purchase a bale of peat moss. She gave a personal…
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    The Buck Stops Where?

    A one-dollar bill met a twenty-dollar bill and said, "Hey, where have you been? I haven't…
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    Baby Growth

    Our first three babies, all girls, each weighed about seven pounds at birth. When our…
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    Smart Bus

    My name is Pastor Jerry Evenson. I pastor a small church in central Idaho on an Indian…
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    Bush Gore Debate

    For those who didn't have time to watch the presidential debate, we've prepared this…
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    Sibling Takes

    As I was dropping my son off at daycare the other day, I overheard some of the children…

sports balls"Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."
--Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann

"I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes." 
--Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh

"You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle"
--Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach

"That's so when I forget how to spell my name, I can still find my clothes."
--Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left wing, explaining why he keeps a color photo of himself above his locker.

"You guys line up alphabetically by height"
--Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach

"I play football. I'm not trying to be a professor. The tests don't seem to make sense to me, measuring your brain on stuff I haven't been through in school."
--Clemson recruit Ray Forsythe, who was ineligible as a freshman because of academic requirements

"I know the Virginia players are smart because you need a 1500 SAT to get in. I have to drop bread crumbs to get our players to and from class."
--George Raveling, Washington State basketball coach

"Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went to prison for three years, not Princeton."
--Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson hooking up again with promoter Don King

"I can't really remember the names of the clubs that we went to."
-- Shaquille O'Neal on whether he had visited the Parthenon during his visit to Greece.

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