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More Jokes

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    Let Sleeping Dogs Lie

    One afternoon, I was in the backyard hanging the laundry when an old, tired-looking dog…
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    Tea Service

    One day my mother was out and my dad was in charge of me and my brother who is four years…
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    Hypo Teen

    Our neighbor used the word hypochondriac to describe the phase her teen-age daughter was…
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    A Father's Method

    A loaded SUV pulled in to the only remaining campsite. Four children leapt from the…
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    Saintly Sons

    Two mothers were talking about their sons. The first said, "My son is such a saint. He…
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    Bag of Chickens

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one at:…
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    Navajo Wisdom

    About 1969 or so, a NASA team doing work for the Apollo moon mission took the astronauts…
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    Goober 911

    Q: Why can't goobers dial 911?A: They can't find the "11" on the phone!
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    First Apartment

    Having moved into his first apartment, our son invited my husband and me for a visit. As…
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    Under Five

    A little child in church for the first time watched as the ushers passed the offering…
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    Top 7 Signs Your Pastor Needs a Vacation

    Top 7 Signs Your Pastor Needs a Vacation7. His first words to the congregation on Sunday…
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    Finkel's Fine

    A little woman called Mount Sinai Hospital. She said, Hello, darling, I'd like to talk…
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    Don't Have Any

    A woman walks into a convenience store. She walks straight to the manager and asks, "Do…
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    Looking Back

    Soon after our last child left home for college, my husband was resting next to me on the…
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    A Brother Names the Babies

    A pregnant woman from Washington, D.C., (whose husband was out of the country) gets in a…
I JUST NEED SOME SPACE.
....  without you in it.

DO I LOOK FAT IN THIS DRESS?
We haven't had a fight in a while.

NO, PIZZA'S FINE.
....  you cheap slob!

I JUST DON'T WANT A BOYFRIEND NOW.
I just don't want you as a boyfriend now.

I DON'T KNOW, WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?
I can't believe you have nothing planned.

COME HERE.
My puppy does this, too.

I LIKE YOU, BUT...
I don't like you.

YOU NEVER LISTEN.
You never listen.

I'LL BE READY IN A MINUTE.
I'm ready, but I'm going to make you wait because I know you will.

OH, NO, I'LL PAY FOR MYSELF.
I'm just being nice; there's no way I'm going dutch.
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