logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

ACTS 2:38

This lady surprised a burglar in her kitchen.  He was all loaded down with the things he was going to steal.  She had no weapon and was all alone.  The only thing that she could think to do was quote scripture.  So she holds up a hand and says: "ACTS 2:38!!!"

The burglar quakes in fear and then freezes to the point that she is able to get to the phone and call 911 for the cops.  When the cops arrive, the burglar is still frozen in place.  They are very much surprised that a woman alone with no weapon could do this.  One of them asked the lady: "How did you do this?"

The woman replied, "I quoted scripture."

The cop turned to the burglar: "What was it about the scripture that had such an effect on you?"

The burglar replied: "Scripture!  What scripture?  I thought she said she had an ax and two 38's."

Powered By JFBConnect

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    Memory School

    Two elderly gentlemen are playing cards on Saturday evening as they have done for the…
  • Default Image

    Medical Fraud

    The police recently busted a man selling 'secret formula' tablets he claimed gave eternal…
  • Default Image

    Cat Prayer

    Cat PrayerNow I lay me down to sleep,I pray this cushy life to keep.I pray for toys that…
  • Default Image

    PICNIC Problem

    Looking over the log book kept by the computer support staff at my office, I noticed…
  • Default Image

    Dad Knew

    My dad and I were talking the other night about love and marriage.He told me that he knew…
  • Default Image

    100GB bug

    Experts warned today of a new and deadly threat to our beleaguered civilization: the…
  • Default Image

    Wake Up!

    A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the…
  • Default Image

    Kids In Church

    Six-year-old Angie and her four-year-old brother Joel were sitting together in church.…
  • Default Image

    Mechanic Applicant

    A man is applying for a job as mechanic that he really wants to get.The boss says, "Can…
  • airport waiting

    Seat Sacrifice

    On the way back to New York as I was sitting in the Phoenix airport, they announced that…
  • Default Image

    First Day Answer

    The child comes home from his first day at school. His Mother asks, "Well, what did you…
  • Default Image

    How To Know When You Are Ready For Parenthood

    How To Know When You Are Ready For ParenthoodMESS TEST: Smear peanut butter on the sofa…
  • stork

    How Was I Born?

    A boy was assigned a paper on childbirth and asked his parents, "How was I born?" "Well,…
  • man grumpy

    Hearing Aid

    While talking with my semi-deaf uncle one evening, I noticed that his "hearing aid" was…
  • Default Image

    No Ears, One Question

    Jack Summers is a constructor at a building site. One day on the site there is a massive…