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More Jokes

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    Backwoods Labor

    In the back woods of Kentucky, the redneck's wife went into labor in the middle of the…
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    Little Tim's Goldfish

    Little Tim was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence.…
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    Dangerous Criminal

    One night, a lady stumbled into the police station with a black eye. She claimed she…
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    College Nerves

    While touring the University with some college-bound friends, I saw an advertisement that…
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    NRA Thanksgiving

    Thanksgiving Day was approaching, and a family had received a Thanksgiving card with a…
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    Charity Auction

    The auto auction I attended was selling cars to benefit charity. Vehicles were classified…
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    You Know You're a Northerner When

    You know you're a northerner when...~ you know the 4 seasons - winter, still winter, not…
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    Third Grade Assignment

    My daughter's third-grade teacher had assigned the children to write a story titled "My…
  • woman old

    I'm Aging Gracefully

    I'm the life of the party ... even when it lasts until 8 p.m I'm very good at opening…
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    Conductor Comment Comeback

    A conductor was having a lot of trouble with one drummer. He constantly gave this guy…
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    Epitaph Adjustment

    A new widow requested the epitaph "Rest in Peace" for her husband's tombstone. When she…
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    Goober Y2K Date Change Project Status:

    Y-to-K Date Change Project Status: Our staff has completed the 18 months of work on time…
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    Employee of the Month

    Chuck Rogers, a self employed marketing consultant, has won his company's 'Employee of…
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    Happy Birthday Elsie

    I play pinochle regularly with seven other women, most of whom are 70 or older. Recently…
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    Carjacking Foiled

    TRUE STORY:Carjacking Foiled:An elderly lady did her shopping and upon return found 4…

Customer: "I've been ringing 0700 2300 for two days and can't get through to enquiries. Can you help?"

Operator: "Where did you get that number from, sir?"

Customer: "It was on the door to the Travel Centre."

Operator: "Sir, they are our opening hours."

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Caller: "I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just realized that I need it. If I turn my system clock back two weeks, will I have my file back again?"

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Samsung Electronics Caller: "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?"

Operator: "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about."

Caller: "On page 1, section 5, of the user guide, it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?"

Operator: "I think you mean the telephone socket on the wall."

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RAC Motoring Services Caller: "Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am travelling in Australia?"

Operator: "Doesn't the product give you a clue?"

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Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while travelling in France): "If I register my car in France, do I have to change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?"

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Directory Enquiries

Caller: "I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff, please."

Operator: "I'm sorry, but there's no listing. Is the spelling correct?"

Caller: "Well, it used to be called the Bargoed Fish Bar, but the 'B' fell off."

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Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.

Operator: "Woven? Are you sure?"

Caller: "Yes. That's what it says on the label: Woven in Scotland."

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On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator:

"I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on."

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