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More Jokes

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    Vendor Problem

    In a software design meeting, we were using typical technical jargon to discuss a data…
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    Fish Tattoo

    As an obstetrician, I sometimes see unusual tattoos when working in labor and delivery.…
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    Government Pipe Specifications

    1. All pipe is to be made of a long hole, surrounded by metal or plastic centered around…
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    Understanding the Metric System

    1 million microphones = 1 megaphone1 million bicycles = 2 megacycles2000 mockingbirds = 2…
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    Bell Call

    The scene: Alexander Graham Bell's laboratory.An exciting new discovery is about to take…
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    Late at Walmart

    Charley, a new retiree greeter at Wal-Mart, just couldn't seem to get to work on…
  • mom and child

    Please and Thank You

    While on maternity leave, a woman from our office brought in her new bundle of joy. She…
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    Great Exercise Program

    Here's the exercise program I'm using to stay in shape this year. You might want to take…
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    Laws of Life

    * Murphy's First Law for Wives: If you ask your husband to pick up five items at the…
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    Fan Help

    Although I have three sons, it was always my daughter who helped me with chores around…
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    Goober Catch

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    School Daze

    It was at the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from…
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    ID Card

    The day I immigrated to the United States, I was given an alien ID card that featured a…
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    Rainy Weather Humor

    Nothing personal against Seattlites - change it to any other place getting a lot of rain.…
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    New Friend Sincerity

    Last summer my wife and I met a couple at a restaurant. After lunch, the women decided to…

Customer: "I've been ringing 0700 2300 for two days and can't get through to enquiries. Can you help?"

Operator: "Where did you get that number from, sir?"

Customer: "It was on the door to the Travel Centre."

Operator: "Sir, they are our opening hours."

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Caller: "I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just realized that I need it. If I turn my system clock back two weeks, will I have my file back again?"

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Samsung Electronics Caller: "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?"

Operator: "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about."

Caller: "On page 1, section 5, of the user guide, it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?"

Operator: "I think you mean the telephone socket on the wall."

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RAC Motoring Services Caller: "Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am travelling in Australia?"

Operator: "Doesn't the product give you a clue?"

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Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while travelling in France): "If I register my car in France, do I have to change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?"

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Directory Enquiries

Caller: "I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff, please."

Operator: "I'm sorry, but there's no listing. Is the spelling correct?"

Caller: "Well, it used to be called the Bargoed Fish Bar, but the 'B' fell off."

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Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.

Operator: "Woven? Are you sure?"

Caller: "Yes. That's what it says on the label: Woven in Scotland."

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On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator:

"I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on."

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