logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    Golf desire

    Detailed instructions on managing your subscription are included after the body of this…
  • Default Image

    Cow Philosophies

    Various organizational philosophies explained in "two cow" terms. Socialism: you have two…
  • Default Image

    Monitors

    I sell new and used computers for a living. At an exhibit and sale, I decided to give…
  • Default Image

    Hiccups

    While waiting in line at the bank, a co-worker developed a very loud case of hiccups. By…
  • doctor office

    Little Voice

    A man walks into his doctor's office and says, "Doctor, I've eaten something that…
  • Default Image

    Vacuous Goober

    It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on "Science & Nature."Her question…
  • Default Image

    Happy Marriage

    On their 50th wedding anniversary, a couple summed up the reason for their long and happy…
  • Default Image

    The Grandma Test

    I was out walking with my 4-year-old granddaughter. She picked up something off the…
  • Default Image

    Omitted Stories

    Reverend Smith, a respected church leader, arrived in a large city to deliver a series of…
  • book mystery

    Invitation

    Mrs. Jones was reading a letter at breakfast. Suddenly she looked up suspiciously at her…
  • Default Image

    The Half Cake Diet

    A woman in our diet club was lamenting that she had gained weight.She'd made her family's…
  • Default Image

    Unique Breakfast

    A man observed a sign in the window of a restaurant that read Unique Breakfast, so he…
  • Default Image

    Lost

    Steve took his new wife camping for the first time. At every opportunity, he passed along…
  • Default Image

    Cat Sale

    A famous art collector is walking through the city when he notices a mangy cat lapping…
  • Default Image

    Soup Words

    It was a formal banquet. The minister had just finished saying grace when a waiter…

(From the Archives back in 1999)

1) Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled.  Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

2) The outreach committee has enlisted 25 visitors to make calls on people who are not afflicted with any church.

4) Evening massage - 6 p.m.

5) The Pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday morning.

6) The audience is asked to remain seated until the end of the recession.

7) Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 to 8:30 pm.
Please use the back door.

8) Ushers will eat latecomers.

9) The third verse of Blessed Assurance will be sung without musical accomplishment.

10) For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

11) The Rev.  Merriwether spoke briefly, much to the delight of the audience.

12) The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth Into Joy."

13) During the absence of our pastor, we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when J.F.  Stubbs supplied our pulpit.

14) Next Sunday Mrs.  Vinson will be soloist for the morning service.
The pastor will then speak on "It's a Terrible Experience."

15) Due to the Rector's illness, Wednesday's healing services will be discontinued until further notice.

16) Stewardship Offertory: "Jesus Paid It All"

17) The music for today's service was all composed by George Friedrich Handel in celebration of the 300th anniversary of his birth.

18) Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

19) The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement on Friday at 7 p.m.  The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

20) The concert held in Fellowship Hall was a great success.  Special thanks are due to the minister's daughter, who labored the whole evening at the piano, which as usual fell upon her.

21) members were present at the church meeting held at the home of Mrs.  Marsha Crutchfield last evening.  Mrs.  Crutchfield and Mrs.
Rankin sang a duet, The Lord Knows Why.

22) A song fest was hell at the Methodist church Wednesday.

23) Today's Sermon: HOW MUCH CAN A MAN DRINK?  with hymns from a full choir.

24) Hymn 43: "Great God, what do I see here?" Preacher: The Rev. Horace Blodgett Hymn 47: "Hark!  an awful voice is sounding"

25) On a church bulletin during the minister's illness: GOD IS GOOD Dr.  Hargreaves is better.

Powered By JFBConnect