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    Attendance Sermons

    A man who hadn't attended church in years suddenly began attending faithfully on Sunday…
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    Procedure Recall

    As a resident physician in radiology, I was speaking with the man whose wife was about to…
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    Rare Steak

    Three Texas cowboys went to a steakhouse to eat. Each was trying to impress the…
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    When I Was Your Age

    A young man who was also an avid golfer found himself with a few hours to spare one…
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    A Hi-Tech Litmus Test

    This morning, on the church newsletter were these instructions:Hold this paper close to…
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    Grandpa's Day Out

    Grandpa's Day Out A police car pulls up in front of grandma Bessie's house, and grandpa…
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    First Sermon

    At his first service, the new preachers sermon was extremely long and dull. As he…
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    Truck-Stop Harassment

    A grizzled old man was eating in a truck stop when three Hell's Angels bikers walked in.…
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    Finally Heard

    Heather and Marcy hadn't seen each other in awhile, so they decided to meet for lunch.The…
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    Helpless Creatures

    A mother and a daughter are shopping in the mall, when the mother eyes an expensive fur…
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    Signs You Are Broke

    1. American Express calls and says: "Leave home without it!" 2. Your idea of a 7-course…
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    In Both Ears

    "It's no good, sir," said the hopeless pupil to his English teacher. "I try to learn, but…
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    Granny's Visit

    Little Tony was so happy to see his grandmother that he ran up and gave her a big hug.…
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    Bad Sign

    A little boy just couldn't learn. One day his teacher asked him who signed the…
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    New Survivor

    Have you heard about the next planned "Survivor" show? Here's the details: - 6 Married…

classroom*  "Jerry was at his grandmother's yesterday, and she did not bring him to school because Jerry couldn't remember where the school was."

*  "Ronnie would not finish his work last night.  He said his brain was too tired of spelling."

*  "Eric hurt his knee in a karate tournament over the weekend.  He won his age group, but was in too much pain to do his math assignment."

*  "Amy did not do her homework last night because we went out to a party and did not get home until late.  If she is tired, please let her sleep during recess time."

*  "Henry stayed home because he had a stomach ache from eating too much frosting."

*  "It was my fault Mike did not do his math homework last night.  His pencil broke and we do not have a pencil sharpener at home."

*  "Scott didn't practice last night because he lost his tooth in the mouthpiece of his trumpet."

*  "Diane was late on Wednesday.  She fell asleep on the bus and was taken back to the bus yard."

*  "Cody was absent yesterday because we were out bowling until 2 AM."

*  "Tommy wasn't in school yesterday because he thought it was Saturday."

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