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    VIP Impression

    My husband was once employed in the printing division of a large manufacturing firm. One…
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    16 Ways To Confuse Your Roomate

    Some of these are a little odd but they would definitely spice up dorm life. 16 Ways To…
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    Clutter Advice

    About a week ago, I came across an Internet advice column that told me how to eliminate…
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    Computer One-liners - Part 1

    Computer One-liners - Part 1Hard Disk space: the final frontier!Hardware: The parts of a…
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    Quotable Quotes

    I stopped believing in Santa Claus when my mother took me to see him in a department…
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    Early

    Ok, what is the deal with "The early bird gets the worm"? He gets up early, and all he…
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    Tech Support

    Five things you don't want to hear from Tech Support: 1. "Duuuuuude! Bummer!" 2. "In…
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    Creative Duelling

    In bygone days, a thin man insulted a large man. The large man challenged his tormentor…
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    Unwritten Warning Labels

    *Unwritten Warning Labels*On a cardboard windshield sun shade: "Warning: Do Not Drive…
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    Top Ten Signs Your Co-worker is a Computer Hacker

    10. You ticked him off once and your next phone bill was for $20,000.9. He's won the…
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    Sharing by Example

    A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin, 5, and Ryan, 3. The boys began to…
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    Quit Bothering Us

    We had spent the day moving from our farmhouse into our new house in town. Early the next…
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    Engineering Dictionary

    *Engineering Dictionary*What the Engineer says (What it really means)A number of…
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    First Words

    The eight-year old boy had never spoken a word-ever. One afternoon, as he sat eating his…
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    Even More Musings

    1. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. 2. One nice thing about egotists: They…

classroom*  "Jerry was at his grandmother's yesterday, and she did not bring him to school because Jerry couldn't remember where the school was."

*  "Ronnie would not finish his work last night.  He said his brain was too tired of spelling."

*  "Eric hurt his knee in a karate tournament over the weekend.  He won his age group, but was in too much pain to do his math assignment."

*  "Amy did not do her homework last night because we went out to a party and did not get home until late.  If she is tired, please let her sleep during recess time."

*  "Henry stayed home because he had a stomach ache from eating too much frosting."

*  "It was my fault Mike did not do his math homework last night.  His pencil broke and we do not have a pencil sharpener at home."

*  "Scott didn't practice last night because he lost his tooth in the mouthpiece of his trumpet."

*  "Diane was late on Wednesday.  She fell asleep on the bus and was taken back to the bus yard."

*  "Cody was absent yesterday because we were out bowling until 2 AM."

*  "Tommy wasn't in school yesterday because he thought it was Saturday."

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