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More Jokes

  • children3

    Political Correctness For Kids

    Your bedroom isn't cluttered; it's "passage-restrictive." Kids don't get in trouble…
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    60's Fans

    Fans of '60's music, my 14-year-old daughter and her best friend got front-row tickets to…
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    Family Records

    The following was overheard at a recent high society party..."My ancestry goes all the…
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    Scavenger Hunt

    A woman answered her front door and saw a little boy holding a list. "Ma'am," he…
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    Give It A Try

    Think of a letter between A and W. Repeat it out loud as you scroll down. Keep going!…
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    Clothing Return

    While working in a clothing store, I noticed that people had no shame about returning…
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    Zack and His Mule

    Zack and his mule were walking down the road when one of Zack's friends drove up and…
  • spray can

    Read The Label

    It was in the early 1960's and spray deodorant, new to the market, was being advertised…
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    First Day

    Little Johnny was thrilled when his turn came to enter kindergarten. To make sure he had…
  • alligator

    Alligator Teeth

    A tourist was admiring the necklace worn by a local Indian. "What is it made of?" she…
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    Cops and Robbers

    Esther Cohen had three very active boys. One summer evening she was playing cops and…
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    The Vending Machine

    A goober named Laura is at a local zoo and comes across a vending machine, which she has…
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    Soup Objects

    The truck driver looked suspiciously at the soup he had just been served in an eatery. It…
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    Even More Musings

    1. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. 2. One nice thing about egotists: They…
*Actual Warnings On Products*

On instructions for a hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

On a bar of Dial bath bar:
Directions: Use like regular soap.

On a frozen dinner package:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.

On a hotel-provided shower cap box:
Fits one head.

On Tesco's Tirimisu dessert:
Do not turn upside down (Printed on the bottom of the box)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.

On packaging from a Rowenta Iron.
Do not iron clothes on body.

On Boot's children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.

On a bottle of Nytol (a sleeping aid):
Warning: May cause drowsiness.

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: Keep out of children.

On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.

On a Japanese food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: Contains nuts.

On an American Airlines package of nuts:
Instructions: Open package, eat nuts.

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.

On a package of Sunmaid raisins:
Why not try tossing over your favorite breakfast cereal?
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