More Jokes

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    Sorry I'm Late Mom

    Late one Saturday evening, I was awakened by the ringing of my phone. In a sleepy grumpy…
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    Serious Shopper

    I was browsing in a souvenir shop when the man next to me struck up a conversation. Just…
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    Where's God?

    Two brothers in a small town were well-known as trouble makers. If there was a problem in…
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    Fatherly Chat

    A young woman brings home her fiancĂ© to meet her parents. After dinner, her mother tells…
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    A Dog's Diary

    5:30am: Started the day as a hero! When the sound of the newspaper hitting the driveway…
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    Ahh, Tourists

    A lady on her first visit to Yellowstone National Park said to her guide, "Look at all…
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    Ticket Excuse

    Philadelphia's Highway Patrol officers hear all kinds of creative excuses that drivers…
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    Hiccup Cure

    A man goes into a drug store and asks the pharmacist if he can give him something to cure…
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    The Front Pew

    An elderly woman walked into the local country church. The friendly usher greeted her at…
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    Career Change

    When Ruthie's grandson Jordan was 5, he always told everyone he wanted to be a doctor…
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    Dark Parachute Jumps

    Nights in England are coal black, making parachute jumps difficult and dangerous. So we…
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    The Top 15 Lines You'll Never Hear in a Western

    15 "I reckon I'll have me a half-caf double latte with a twist."14 "Gentlemen, rather…
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    Going to Disneyworld

    "Hey Grandpa!, can you make a noise like a frog?""I think I can do that. Why?""'Cuz Dad…
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    Fearless Leader

    As a professor at Texas A & M, I taught during the day and did research at night. I would…
  • doctor4

    Baby Prescription

    A woman brought her baby in to see the doctor, and he determined right away the baby had…
*Actual Warnings On Products*

On instructions for a hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

On a bar of Dial bath bar:
Directions: Use like regular soap.

On a frozen dinner package:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.

On a hotel-provided shower cap box:
Fits one head.

On Tesco's Tirimisu dessert:
Do not turn upside down (Printed on the bottom of the box)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.

On packaging from a Rowenta Iron.
Do not iron clothes on body.

On Boot's children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.

On a bottle of Nytol (a sleeping aid):
Warning: May cause drowsiness.

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: Keep out of children.

On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.

On a Japanese food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: Contains nuts.

On an American Airlines package of nuts:
Instructions: Open package, eat nuts.

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.

On a package of Sunmaid raisins:
Why not try tossing over your favorite breakfast cereal?
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