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More Jokes

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    Crate of Chickens

    The farmer's son was returning from the market with a crate of chickens his father had…
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    Dewey Check

    I walked into my sister's kitchen and found my nephew, Dewey, having a snack."Where's…
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    Things Not To Say or Do at a Job Interview

    ** See photo of interviewer's family on desk, point, start laughing uncontrollably.** Ask…
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    Calls to Information Assistance

    Caller: I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff, please.Operator: I'm…
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    Proposal Reaction

    A young man confided to his mother that he had proposed to his girlfriend and they were…
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    Insurance Claims

    These are from insurance forms in which drivers were asked to explain their disasters in…
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    Gender Request

    After learning the Lamaze method of natural childbirth, I was admitted to the delivery…
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    Front Decisions

    The Army assigned a group of eminent psychiatrists to determine the best way to select…
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    Moving Label

    Having moved 15 times during our 37-year marriage, my husband and I appreciate movers who…
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    Senior "Favorite Things"

    There are recent rumors that Julie Andrews did a concert for AARP (The American…
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    Computer Problem Report Form

    COMPUTER PROBLEM REPORT FORM: 1. Describe your problem:…
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    Mint Mom

    When the U.S. Mint reissued two-dollar bills, I thought they might someday become…
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    Scale Pondering

    Two youngsters were closely examining bathroom scales on display at the department…
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    Tennis Talk

    A manager was told by his doctor to take up some sport for exercise so he decided to play…
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    Utensil Rejection

    My friend Ann and I were eating at a Chinese restaurant. When an elderly waiter set…

*Advertising Terms Explained*

NEW - Different color from previous design.

ALL NEW - Parts are not interchangeable with previous design.

EXCLUSIVE - Imported product.

UNMATCHED - Almost as good as the competition.

FOOLPROOF OPERATION - No provision for adjustments.

ADVANCED DESIGN - The advertising agency doesn't understand it.

IT'S HERE AT LAST - Rush job. Nobody knew it was coming.

FIELD TESTED - Manufacturer lacks test equipment.

HIGH ACCURACY - Unit on which all parts fit.

FUTURISTIC - No other reason why it looks the way it does.

REDESIGNED - Previous flaws fixed - we hope.

DIRECT SALES ONLY - Factory had a big argument with distributor.

YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT - We finally got one to work.

BREAKTHROUGH - We finally figured out a use for it.

MAINTENANCE FREE - Impossible to fix.

MEETS ALL STANDARDS - Ours, not yours.

SOLID-STATE - Heavy as anything!

HIGH RELIABILITY - We made it work long enough to ship it.

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