More Jokes

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    Burglar and Vicar

    A burglar broke into a minister's house and told the pastor, "One move and you're dead.…
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    Quips to Ponder

    If your life takes a turn for the worse, remember that you are the one who is driving! My…
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    The Night of Thanksgiving

    And after all is said and done.....the kitchen cleaned up, the football game is over, the…
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    Mouse Trap

    A woman rushes into a hardware store and said, "Can I have a mouse trap, please? And will…
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    Helping Sam at Church

    Because our former small-town parish was not a wealthy one, our pastor was dependent on…
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    ACTS 2:38

    This lady surprised a burglar in her kitchen. He was all loaded down with the things he…
  • accent boy


    About a year ago my sister, who lives in Virginia, was talking with her four year old…
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    Red, Yellow, Blue

    One afternoon, this guy drives down a highway to visit a nearby lake and relax. On his…
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    Strange Exam Answers

    1. Ancient Egypt was inhabited by mummies and they all wrote in hydraulics. They lived in…
  • milk2


    I'm sure you've heard the old story referring to optimism and pessimism that is…
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    Lawyer News

    "I have good news and bad news," the defence attorney told his client. "First the bad…
  • milk

    Milkman Notes

    These notes left for milkmen came from the UK, so you'll notice a slight, endearing…
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    Roman Numerals

    One of my college friends asked a group of us for advice on organizing his final report…
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    Location Question

    Tiring of the same old buzz cut from the base barber at Fort Dix, New Jersey, I went into…
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    Blind Date Slap

    An 85-year-old widow went on a blind date with a 90-year-old man. When she returned to…

*Advertising Terms Explained*

NEW - Different color from previous design.

ALL NEW - Parts are not interchangeable with previous design.

EXCLUSIVE - Imported product.

UNMATCHED - Almost as good as the competition.

FOOLPROOF OPERATION - No provision for adjustments.

ADVANCED DESIGN - The advertising agency doesn't understand it.

IT'S HERE AT LAST - Rush job. Nobody knew it was coming.

FIELD TESTED - Manufacturer lacks test equipment.

HIGH ACCURACY - Unit on which all parts fit.

FUTURISTIC - No other reason why it looks the way it does.

REDESIGNED - Previous flaws fixed - we hope.

DIRECT SALES ONLY - Factory had a big argument with distributor.

YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT - We finally got one to work.

BREAKTHROUGH - We finally figured out a use for it.

MAINTENANCE FREE - Impossible to fix.

MEETS ALL STANDARDS - Ours, not yours.

SOLID-STATE - Heavy as anything!

HIGH RELIABILITY - We made it work long enough to ship it.

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