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More Jokes

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    Cowboy and The Preacher

    One Sunday a cowboy went to church. When he entered, he saw that he and the preacher were…
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    Brick Order

    A man goes into his local building supply store and orders 10,000 bricks."May I ask what…
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    Earworms

    Earworms are songs that crawl into your head and stay. 98% of us have had a song stuck in…
  • A joke about two hunters lost in the forest.

    Lost Goober Hunters

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one here. My uncle Joe and…
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    Basic Training

    For some recruits, there is nothing basic about basic training. It was clear that one…
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    Kind Word

    A man walked into a restaurant in a strange town. The waiter came and asked him for his…
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    Larger Than 20

    A friend and I were standing in line at a fast-food restaurant, waiting to place our…
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    Getting Fat

    When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three year old came into the room…
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    Stone's Throw

    A vacationer e-mailed a seaside hotel to ask its location."It's only a stone's throw away…
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    Parrot Strings

    A parrot was in a pet shop with a string attached to each leg when a man walked in…
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    Scientist's Convention

    In the far distant future in the year 4527, a number of scientists from all over the…
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    Flower Switch

    A new business was opening and one of the owner's friends wanted to send him flowers for…
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    The Front Pew

    An elderly woman walked into the local country church. The friendly usher greeted her at…
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    F1 - Help

    My friend was on duty in the main computer lab on a quiet afternoon he noticed a young…
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    Tired of Rejection?

    Tired of being rejected for jobs - maybe this form letter will come in handy. Dear…

Due to increasing products liability litigation, beer manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all beer containters:

1.  Warning: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

2.  Warning: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a goober.

3.  Warning: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.

4.  Warning: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.

5.  Warning: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-girlfriends are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.

6.  Warning: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.

7.  Warning: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers.

8.  Warning: Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter and more handsome than some really, really big guy named FRANZ.

9.  Warning: Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.

10.  Warning: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.

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