logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    Mother Ring

    While picking up a prescription, I noticed that the woman who gave me my medication was…
  • Default Image

    Another Reason Not To Drink

    This guy enters a bar located at the top of the Empire State Building in New York. It…
  • Default Image

    Sibling Takings

    As I was dropping my son off at daycare the other day, I overheard some of the children…
  • Default Image

    In My Day

    A young man who was also an avid golfer found himself with a few hours to spare one…
  • Default Image

    Who's The Expert?

    On a flight to Florida, I was preparing my notes for one of the parent-education seminars…
  • Default Image

    Positively Wrong

    A linguistics professor was lecturing his class."In English," he explained, "a double…
  • Default Image

    Interview Bloopers

    Vice Presidents and personnel directors of the one hundred largest corporations were…
  • Default Image

    Military Haircut

    Tiring of the same old buzz haircut from the base barber at Fort Dix, New Jersey, I went…
  • Default Image

    Helping Sam at Church

    Because our former small-town parish was not a wealthy one, our pastor was dependent on…
  • Default Image

    Cat Joke

    A man runs into the vet's office carrying his dog, screaming for help. The vet rushes him…
  • Default Image

    Business Exhaustion

    The businessman dragged himself home and barely made it to his chair before he dropped…
  • Default Image

    Bulletproof

    The speaker at a bank's drive-through window had been broken for weeks, and the tellers…
  • Default Image

    Work Prayer

    Confiding in a co-worker, I told her about a problem in our office and my fear that I…
  • A young boy watches his dad help birth a calf.

    Calf Birth

    A man was helping one of his cows give birth when he noticed his 4-year-old son standing…
  • pill bottle

    Prescription

    A man goes to the doctor and tells him that he hasn't been feeling well. The doctor…

Here is an all purpose excuse form, designed to get you out of the trouble you've gotten yourself into. Where there's a multiple choice, pick the one that works best for your situation and just go with it. You'll be surprised how effective this form can be if you just let your instincts guide you!

Dear

a) Mom,

b) Dad,

c) love of my life,

d) Assistant Principal,

e) Local Police Chief,

Words cannot begin to express how sorry I am that your

a) car

b) house

c) pet

d) espresso maker

e) left arm

was severely damaged by my

a) infantile

b) puerile

c) inept

d) comically brilliant but nonetheless sadistic

e) woefully under appreciated prank

How could I have known that the

a) car

b) jet ski

c) large helium balloon

d) rodent driven sledge

e) Zamboni

I was riding in would go so far out of control? And while it is true that I should not have pointed it in the direction of your

a) house,

b) wife,

c) Cub Scout troop,

d) 1/16th sized replica of the Statue of Liberty, complete with light bulb in the torch,

e) priceless collection of antique knitting needles,

you must understand that it was all meant in fun. The subsequent carnage that I caused is beyond my ability to

a) imagine,

b) fathom,

c) comprehend,

d) appreciate,

e) pay for,

and I must therefore humbly ask your forgiveness. I know that you are perfectly within your rights to

a) hate me,

b) sue me,

c) spank me,

d) take my firstborn,

e) gouge out my eyes with spoons and feed them to the fish in your koi pond,

but I ask you to remember all the good times we've had, joshing around at

a) school

b) work

c) church

d) the bowling alley

e) the municipal jail

and to remember that I am first and foremost your

a) friend

b) child

c) sibling

d) lease co-signer

e) only possible match should you ever need a bone marrow transplant.

I think that counts for more than one prank, especially one that

a) was so stupid.

b) was so silly.

c) would have been funny if it worked.

d) you would have done, if you had thought of it first.

e) I'm going to use again on someone else.

Sincerely,

Enter name here (or alias): ________________________

Powered By JFBConnect