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More Jokes

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    Wakeup Fight

    Following an especially angry argument, Mr. and Mrs. Smith went to bed not speaking to…
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    Last One

    A New Mom took her baby daughter to the supermarket for the first time. She dressed her…
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    Add Some Fun To Life

    Add Some Fun To Life Put your garbage can on your desk and label it 'IN'. Page yourself…
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    Mouse Mom

    A mother mouse and a baby mouse are walking along, when all of a sudden, a cat attacks…
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    Dollar Measure

    Our mom needed a new mattress for her antique bed, so my brother, Josh, and I decided to…
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    Daaaad!

    A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later:"Da-ad...""What?""I'm…
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    Diary Secrets

    A little boy asked his mother, "What's that you're reading?"A diary.What's in it?I can't…
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    Lawyer Light Bulb

    Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?A: Such number as may be deemed…
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    2 Requests

    An elderly woman decided to prepare her will and told her preacher she had two final…
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    Civil War Re-enactment

    Thinking his son would enjoy seeing the re-enactment of a Civil War battle, my niece's…
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    Marrying Young

    My sister, went to the department store to check out the bridal registry of our niece…
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    Goodbye From George

    George had died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out his Last Will and…
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    Family Records

    The following was overheard at a recent high society party..."My ancestry goes all the…
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    Vampire Bat

    A young vampire bat came flapping in from the night, covered in fresh blood and perched…
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    Dayvorce

    A farmer walked into an attorney's office wanting to file for a divorce.The attorney…

When you are out of the office, here are some away messages to use:

1. Thank you for your e-mail. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.

2. Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.

3. Due to a transporter malfunction, I am now in the 24th century, and I don't know when I'll be back. But hey, leave a message. Someone might get to it.

4. In case of a business emergency, I may be reached 24 hours a day at (insert Boss's cell phone number here).

5. The e-mail server is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try sending again.

6. Please reply to this e-mail so I will know that you got this message.

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