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    Memory Improvement

    I knew that as I was getting older, and finally able to admit it, certain things were…
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    Grandmothers

    The following have been taken from papers written by a class of 8-year-olds.A grandmother…
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    Zack and His Mule

    Zack and his mule were walking down the road when one of Zack's friends drove up and…
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    Talking in Your Sleep

    A wife and husband both talked in their sleep. She loved auctions; his hobby was golf.The…
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    Thrown Off Horse

    I had a near death experience that has changed me forever. The other day, I went…
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    Vulgar Parrot

    So there's this fella with a parrot. And this parrot swears like a sailor, I mean he's a…
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    Away From His Desk

    As the boss was leaving the office to play golf, he instructed his secretary to tell all…
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    Helicopter Debate

    My cousin worked on the Alaska pipeline as a welder. He said helicopters were a big help…
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    I Love My Job

    I Love My Job (apologies to Dr. Seuss) I love my job, I love the pay, I love it more and…
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    Most Famous Man

    A trio of old veterans were bragging about the heroic exploits of their ancestors one…
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    Mess Sign

    A sign posted on the wall of an Army mess read, "Don't Waste Food -- Food will win the…
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    Beautiful Name Tag

    Our favorite restaurant has a waitress whose name-tag reads "Beautiful." "Is that really…
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    Speeding Registration

    On a long drive from Virginia, I thought I was traveling at a reasonable speed, but the…
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    Not as Bad as They Say

    Thanks to my good, Texan friend Walter Smith for this one.Chuck was sitting in an…
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    Exercise Program

    Here is an exercise program for those of us whose wisdom exceeds our ambition. The doctor…

Fresh from a visit to the dentist, I decided to stop at my bank. Barely able to enunciate, I told the teller, "I'm sorry about not speaking more clearly. I've had Novocain."

"You should have used the drive-through," she said.

"Why?"

"Everyone who goes through sounds like you," she explained.

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