logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    Robbie's Move

    Used to being the center of attention, Robbie was a little more than jealous of his new…
  • new years_eve_white_hat

    Newlywed Compromise

    For our first New Year's together as a married couple, my wife offered me a choice of…
  • birthday2

    Jury Age

    Just as she was celebrating her 80th birthday, our friend received a jury-duty notice.…
  • Default Image

    That Line Thing

    If you work with someone like this, you have my condolences. One of our servers crashed.…
  • Default Image

    Goober Medical Terms

    enign.......................What you be after you be…
  • Default Image

    Bad Sign

    A little boy just couldn't learn. One day his teacher asked him who signed the…
  • Default Image

    Epitaph

    A doctor wrote about an epitaph he had seen in a local cemetery:"In memory of my father:…
  • Default Image

    Sponge Mistake

    In the doctors office two patients are talking."You know, I had an appendectomy last…
  • Default Image

    Redecorating Help

    A young woman decided to redecorate her bedroom. She wasn't sure how many rolls of…
  • Default Image

    New Flavor?

    The young man entered the Ice Cream Palace and asked, "What kinds of ice cream do you…
  • Default Image

    Nativity Accent

    In a small Southern town there was a "Nativity Scene" that showed great skill and talent…
  • Default Image

    Bible Confusion

    The little girl was sitting with her grandmother, who had presented her with her first…
  • child2

    Light Confusion

    A little boy forgot his lines in a Sunday School presentation. His mother, sitting in the…
  • Default Image

    Tag Fad

    My teenager was headed to school one morning when I told him that the neck tag on his…
  • Default Image

    Helpful Executive

    A young executive was leaving the office late one evening when he found the CEO standing…

Because I am A Guy...

..I must hold the television remote control in my hand while I watch TV.  If the thing has been misplaced, I'll miss a whole show looking for it, though one time I was able to survive by holding a calculator.

..when I lock my keys in the car, I will fiddle with a wire clothes hanger and ignore your suggestions that we call road service until long after hypothermia has set in.  Oh, and when the car isn't running very well, I will pop the hood and stare at the engine as if I know what I'm looking at.  If another guy shows up, one of us will say to the other, "I used to be able to fix these things, but now with all these computers and everything, I wouldn't know where to start."

..when I catch a cold I need someone to bring me soup and take care of me while I lie in bed and moan.  You never get as sick as I do, so for you this isn't an issue.

..I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries at the store, like milk, or bread.  I cannot be expected to find exotic items like "Cumin" or "Tofu."  For all I know these are the same thing.  And never, under any circumstances, expect me to pick up a copy of "Cosmo" or "Better Homes & Gardens."

..when one of our appliances stops working, I will insist on taking it apart, despite evidence that this will just cost me twice as much once the repair person gets here and has to put it back together.

..I don't think we're all that lost, and no, I don't think we should stop and ask someone.  Why would you listen to a complete stranger--how could HE know where we're going?

..you don't have to ask me if I liked the movie.  Chances are, if you're crying at the end of it, I didn't.

..I think what you're wearing is fine.  I thought what you were wearing five minutes ago was fine, too.  Either pair of shoes is fine.  With the belt or without it looks fine.  Your hair is fine.  You look fine.  Can we just go now?

Powered By JFBConnect