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    Excuses To Give When You Have Missed Work

    ~ I can't come in to work today because I'll be stalking my previous boss, who fired me…
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    Walking on Water

    Bob, the goober, heard a rumor that his father, grandfather and great-grandfather had all…
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    Odd News Reports

    *"The license fee for altered dogs with a certificate will be $3 and for pets owned by…
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    Anniversary Card

    It was our second anniversary, and my husband sent me flowers at the office. He told the…
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    Evangelist Request

    During a January revival an evangelist asked the people in line what they needed. One…
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    Goober Mirror

    Two goobers, Carol and Patty, were walking down the street.Carol noticed a compact on the…
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    Evil Brothers

    There were two evil brothers. They were rich and used their money to keep their ways from…
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    Cinnamon Rolls

    At breakfast one day, I eagerly waited for my husband to comment on my first attempt at…
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    Pot-bellied Stove

    An engineer, a psychologist, and a theologian were hunting in the wilderness of northern…
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    Exercise Classes

    I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing.If I *had*…
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    Army Arrival

    My youngest brother, Tony had just completed Army basic training and was on leave prior…
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    Whale Speak

    An expert on whales was telling friends about some of the unusual findings he had made.…
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    Parachute Charity

    I volunteered recently to perform a parachute jump for charity. On our first day of…
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    The Woodcutter

    This fellow is looking to buy a saw to cut down some trees in his back yard. He goes to a…
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    Wedding Report

    "How did the wedding go?" asked the preacher's wife."Just fine until I asked the bride if…

One morning I was called to pick up my son at the school nurse's office.

When I walked through the main entrance, I noticed a woman, curlers in her hair, wearing pajamas. "Why are you dressed like that?" I asked her.

"I told my son," she explained, "that if he ever did anything to embarrass me, I would embarrass him back. He was caught cutting school. So now I've come to spend the day with him!"

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