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    What It Means

    Five year old Becky answered the door when the Census taker came by.She told the Census…
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    Driving Worries

    I decided to stop worrying about my teenage son's driving and take advantage of it.I got…
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    Age

    When you are young, you want to be the master of your fate and the captain of your soul.…
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    Lots of Kids

    I have five siblings, three sisters and two brothers. One night I was chatting with my…
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    Joey Sets The Table

    A certain man had invited the pastor and his wife for dinner, and it was little Joey's…
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    Hymns for Speeders

    Now, for those who speed on the highway - a few hymns for you: 45 mph.................God…
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    Nabbed

    My friend, the manager of a grocery store, nabbed a shoplifter in the act. He was…
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    Application

    An applicant was filling out a job application. When he came to the question, "Have you…
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    Bigger Piece

    One night at the dinner table, the wife commented, "When we were first married, you took…
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    Yellow Canaries

    A lady went to a pet shop."I'd like to buy two yellow canaries," she told the owner."We…
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    Rejected Rejection

    Re: Rejected Rejection Dear Ms. Ezell: Thank you for your letter of July 17. After…
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    Family Cleaning

    Unexpected guests were on the way, and my mother, an impeccable housekeeper, rushed…
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    Meatloaf

    A recent bride called her mother one evening in tears. "Oh, Mom, I tried to make…
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    Fish Heads

    A customer at Green's Gourmet Grocery marveled at the proprietor's quick wit and…
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    Deer Hunting

    A group of friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for the day. That night, one…

An 85-year-old widow went on a blind date with a 90-year-old man. When she returned to her daughter's house later that night, she seemed upset.

"What happened, Mother?" the daughter asked.

"I had to slap his face three times!"

"You mean he got fresh?"

"No," she answered, "I thought he was dead."

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