logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    First Case Tried

    An investment counselor decided to go out on her own. She was shrewd and diligent, so…
  • Default Image

    Hamster Care

    After buying her kids a pet hamster, after they PROMISED they would take care of it, Mom,…
  • Default Image

    Camping Privacy

    Getting away from their high-stress jobs, a couple spends relaxing weekends in their…
  • Default Image

    Intercom Repair

    My friend's son worked at a fast-food restaurant when he was in high school. One night…
  • hammer

    Helping Daddy

    One day a young boy ran crying to his mother and rubbing his behind. His mother said,…
  • Default Image

    Stolen Turkey

    Ducking into confession with a turkey in his arms, Brian said, "Forgive me, Father, for I…
  • Default Image

    What a Teacher Means

    What a teacher says and what he/she really means.1. Your son has a remarkable ability in…
  • Default Image

    Frugal - to save

    Mary's fourth grade homework assignment was to make sentences using the words in her…
  • Default Image

    Rice Preference

    The young woman really thought she'd been very patient, through a protracted period of…
  • printer 2

    Do It Yourself

    When a guy's printer type began to grow faint, he called a local repair shop where a…
  • Default Image

    Where's God?

    Two brothers in a small town were well-known as trouble makers. If there was a problem in…
  • Default Image

    Prenatal Visit

    A couple was making their first visit to Dr. Mike Wilson prior to the birth of their…
  • ski fall

    Preparing For Ski Season

    Ski season will be here soon! Hence, the following list of exercises to get you prepared:…
  • Default Image

    Cheap Hearing Aid

    A man realized he needed to purchase a hearing aid, but he felt unwilling to spend much…
  • Default Image

    Drug Shirt

    My kindergarten-aged daughter suddenly announced just before school that she needed to…

I am writing in response to your request for additional information.  In block number three of the accident reporting form, I put "poor planning" as the cause of my accident.  You said in your letter that I should explain more and I trust that the following details are sufficient:

I am a bricklayer by trade.  On the day of the accident, I was working along on the roof of a new six-story building.  When I completed my work, I discovered that I had about 500 pounds of bricks left over.  Rather than carry the bricks down by hand I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley, which fortunately was attached to the side of the building at the sixth floor.

Securing the rope at the ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it.  Then I went back to the ground and untied the rope, holding it tightly to insure a slow descent of the 500 pounds of bricks.  You will note in block number 11 of the accident reporting form that I weigh 135 pounds.

Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope.  Needless to say, I proceeded at a rather rapid rate up the side of the building.

In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming down.  This explains the fractured scull and broken collarbone.

Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley.

Fortunately, by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope in spite of my pain.

At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground - and the bottom fell out of the barrel.  Devoid of the weight of the bricks, the barrel now weighed approximately 50 pounds.

I refer you again to my weight in block number 11.  As you might imagine, I began a rapid descent down the side of the building.

In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up.  This accounts for the two fractured ankles and lacerations of my legs and lower body.

The encounter with the barrel, slowed me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell onto the pile of bricks and fortunately, only three vertebrae were cracked.
I am sorry to report, however, that as I lay there on the bricks in pain, unable to move, and watching the barrel six stories above - I again lost my presence of mind.

I let go of the rope!

original author unknown (but performed by many)

Powered By JFBConnect