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More Jokes

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    Norma Findlay in Room 302

    A sweet grandmother telephoned St. Michael's Hospital. She timidly asked, Is it possible…
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    Shaking Hands

    "Doctor, you've got to help me - I just can't stop my hands from shaking!" "Do you drink…
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    Construction Noise

    During a beautiful spring afternoon, I was attending a music festival. Just as I stopped…
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    Hearing Problems

    An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the…
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    No Wonder English is So Hard to Learn

    No wonder English is so hard to learn. We polish the Polish furniture.He could lead if he…
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    Actual Church Bulletin Bloopers

    (From the Archives back in 1999)1) Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other…
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    Possessed Computer?

    For a computer programming class, I sat directly across from someone, and our computers…
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    First Apartment

    Having moved into his first apartment, our son invited my husband and me for a visit. As…
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    Murphy's Laws of Law Enforcement

    New uniforms and ties attract catsup and gravy.You will never get the urge to use the…
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    Return Policy

    The store's policy on returns was prominently posted at every register as well as…
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    Afraid To Cross

    Two men stand at a river which they are about to cross when they notice crocodiles…
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    Bad News From The Doctor

    A man hadn't been feeling well at all, so he went to his doctor for a complete check-up.…
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    Know Your States

    The old pastor made it a practice to visit the parish school one day a week. He walked…
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    Sisters at the Superbowl

    Two elderly sisters donated $25 to a charity and, to their surprise, won tickets to the…
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    Doctor's Writing

    Did you hear about the doctor who wrote out a prescription in the usual doctor's…

Enough here for many to laugh at themselves.

CANADIAN UNIVERSITY LIGHT-BULB JOKES

How many Lakehead students does it take to change a light-bulb?
None---Thunder Bay doesn't have electricity.

How many U of T students does it take to change a light-bulb?
Two--One to change the light-bulb and one to crack under the pressure.

How many Algonquin students does it take to change a light-bulb?
Only one, but he gets six credits for it.

How many Nipissing students does it take to change a light-bulb?
None--Sudbury looks better in the dark.

How many Queen's students does it take to change a light-bulb?
One--he holds the bulb and the world revolves around him How many Waterloo students does it take to change a light-bulb?
five --one to design a nuclear-powered one that never needs changing, one to figure out how to power the rest of Waterloo using that nuked light-bulb, two to install it, and one to write the computer program that controls the wall switch.

How many Western students does it take to change a light-bulb?
Five--One to change the light-bulb and four to find the perfect J.  Crew outfit to wear for the occasion.

How many McMaster students does it take to change a light-bulb?
Two--One to change the bulb and the other to say loudly how he did it as well as a Queen's student.

How many St.  Lawrence College students does it take to change a light-bulb?
One--she calls a Gael to do it.

How many Carleton students does it take to change a light-bulb?
Two--One to change the bulb and one to complain about how if they were at a better school the light-bulb wouldn't go out.

How many McGill students does it take to change a light-bulb?
One--but she can't do it on Friday night.

How many Brock students does it take to change a light-bulb?
Seven--One to change the light bulb and six to throw a party because he didn't screw it in upside down this time.

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