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More Jokes

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    Getting Older Lines

    Now that I'm older....here's what I've discovered: I STARTED out with nothing....I still…
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    What A Hoot

    Each evening bird lover Tom stood in his backyard, hooting like an owl - and one night,…
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    Fishing Advice

    Two buddies are fishing, but they haven't caught anything all day. Then, another…
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    Hymns For Professionals

    DENTIST: Crown Him with many crownsCONTRACTORS: The church's one foundationOBSTETRICIANS:…
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    Incapacitated

    I was recovering from surgery when a charity representative phoned asking me to take part…
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    Flashlight Defense

    A tourist was being led through the swamps of Florida. "Is it true," he asked, "that an…
  • office man

    Corporate Listening

    The company I worked for had an employee suggestion competition, the entire staff was…
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    Pastor To The Rescue

    There were two men shipwrecked on this island. The minute they got on to the island one…
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    Fried Eggs

    A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.Suddenly her husband burst…
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    The Chief's Wife

    "NEXT," the conference emcee announced, "we have the chief of the Minnesota State Patrol,…
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    Amazing Anagrams

    Not strictly humor, but truly amazing....Dormitory = Dirty RoomThe Morse Code = Here Come…
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    Parking Confusion

    After driving up and down several lanes, I finally found a parking spot at the shopping…
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    No Contraband

    After an overnight flight to meet my father at his latest military assignment, my mother…
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    Procedure Recall

    As a resident physician in radiology, I was speaking with the man whose wife was about to…
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    Goober Interview

    The executive was interviewing a goober for a position in his company.He wanted to find…

Enough here for many to laugh at themselves.

CANADIAN UNIVERSITY LIGHT-BULB JOKES

How many Lakehead students does it take to change a light-bulb?
None---Thunder Bay doesn't have electricity.

How many U of T students does it take to change a light-bulb?
Two--One to change the light-bulb and one to crack under the pressure.

How many Algonquin students does it take to change a light-bulb?
Only one, but he gets six credits for it.

How many Nipissing students does it take to change a light-bulb?
None--Sudbury looks better in the dark.

How many Queen's students does it take to change a light-bulb?
One--he holds the bulb and the world revolves around him How many Waterloo students does it take to change a light-bulb?
five --one to design a nuclear-powered one that never needs changing, one to figure out how to power the rest of Waterloo using that nuked light-bulb, two to install it, and one to write the computer program that controls the wall switch.

How many Western students does it take to change a light-bulb?
Five--One to change the light-bulb and four to find the perfect J.  Crew outfit to wear for the occasion.

How many McMaster students does it take to change a light-bulb?
Two--One to change the bulb and the other to say loudly how he did it as well as a Queen's student.

How many St.  Lawrence College students does it take to change a light-bulb?
One--she calls a Gael to do it.

How many Carleton students does it take to change a light-bulb?
Two--One to change the bulb and one to complain about how if they were at a better school the light-bulb wouldn't go out.

How many McGill students does it take to change a light-bulb?
One--but she can't do it on Friday night.

How many Brock students does it take to change a light-bulb?
Seven--One to change the light bulb and six to throw a party because he didn't screw it in upside down this time.

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