logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

Cancelling Cards

Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you die. This is so priceless, and so easy to see happening, customer service being what it is today.

A lady died this past January, and Citibank billed her for February and March for their annual service charges on her credit card, and then added late fees and interest on the monthly charge. The balance had been $0.00, now is somewhere around $60.00. A family member placed a call to Citibank:

Family Member: "I am calling to tell you that she died in January."

Citibank: "The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply."

Family Member: "Maybe, you should turn it over to collections."

Citibank: "Since it is two months past due, it already has been."

Family Member: So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?"

Citibank: "Either report her account to the frauds division or report her to the credit bureau, maybe both!"

Family Member: "Do you think God will be mad at her?"

Citibank: "Excuse me?"

Family Member: "Did you just get what I was telling you - the part about her being dead?"

Citibank: "Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor."

Supervisor gets on the phone:

Family Member: "I'm calling to tell you, she died in January."

Citibank: "The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply."

Family Member: "You mean you want to collect from her estate?"

Citibank: (Stammer) "Are you her lawyer?"

Family Member: "No, I'm her great nephew." (Lawyer info given)

Citibank: "Could you fax us a certificate of death?"

Family Member: "Sure." (fax number is given)

After they get the fax:

Citibank: "Our system just isn't set-up for death. I don't know what more I can do to help."

Family Member: "Well, if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep billing her. I don't think she will care."

Citibank: "Well, the late fees and charges do still apply."

Family Member: "Would you like her new billing address?"

Citibank: "That might help."

Family Member: "Odessa Memorial Cemetery, Highway 129, Plot Number 69."

Citibank: "Sir, that's a cemetery!"

Family Member: "What do you do with dead people on your planet?

Powered By JFBConnect

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    Bunch Of Laughs

    Over the massive front doors of a church, these words were inscribed: The Gate of…
  • Default Image

    Sibling Takings

    As I was dropping my son off at daycare the other day, I overheard some of the children…
  • Default Image

    Coffee Vending Machine

    A man put his fifty cents in a vending machine and watched helplessly while the cup…
  • parrot

    Do Not Talk To My Parrot

    Mrs. Lonefold's dishwasher quit working, so she called a repairman. He couldn't…
  • men strong

    Fee Surprise

    Two brawny men came to my house to install some new floor covering in the kitchen. Once…
  • Default Image

    Longevity Answer

    The Jewish Chronicle had heard that Benny was coming up to his 110th birthday so they…
  • Default Image

    Passing Time

    My husband and I both look very young for our ages. In fact, we've hardly aged a day…
  • Default Image

    What Am I?

    Miss Jones had been giving her second-grade students a lesson on science. She had…
  • Default Image

    Party Advice

    A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly…
  • Default Image

    Resume Cover Letters

    These were taken from real Resumes and Cover Letters, and were printed in "Fortune"…
  • Default Image
  • Default Image

    CD Generation

    After I bought my mother a compact-disc player and some CDs, she was excited to discover…
  • Default Image

    Goober with a Pager

    One of my friends works in the customer service call center of a national pager company.…
  • Default Image

    French Dream

    A boy was having a lot of difficulty in French class.To encourage him, his teacher said,…
  • Default Image

    Tub Baptism

    A friend of mine took her four-year-old daughter to a baptismal service at her church.…