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More Jokes

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    Paper Eater

    A minister delivered a sermon in ten minutes one Sunday morning, which was about half the…
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    Goober On The Net

    A goober went to his mail box several times before it was even time for the mailman to…
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    Housework Challenged

    One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt.Seconds after he…
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    Waiting for Dark

    Preparing for a family vacation, Kathy and Matt explained to their young children that…
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    Dependents

    A man submitting information to his income tax preparer was asked how many dependents he…
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    Money Date

    Part way through his dinner date, my brother deduced the woman he was with was more…
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    Ride To Church

    A teenager who had just received her learner's permit offered to drive her parents to…
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    The Lord's Prayer - Sort of

    A mother was teaching her three-year-old The Lord's Prayer. For several evenings at…
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    Zeek's Hang Glider

    In the back woods of Gooberland, you don't see too many people hang-gliding. Ol' Zeek,…
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    Talking Horse

    A jogger, running down a country road, is startled as a horse yells at him, "Hey! Come…
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    Card Dog

    A man walked by a table in a hotel and noticed three men and a dog playing cards. The dog…
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    Meatloaf

    A recent bride called her mother one evening in tears. "Oh, Mom, I tried to make…
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    Preacher and Cowboy

    One Sunday a cowboy went to church. When he entered, he saw that he and the preacher were…
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    Pilot Pride

    As one of relatively few female airline pilots, I've often been mistaken for a flight…
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    Signs the Childhood is Over

    Just one peanut butter and jelly sandwich doesn't do it anymore. Driving a car doesn't…

If the car ad claims ..., it really means ...

- rough condition... too bad to lie about

- parts car... beyond repair

- immaculate... recently washed

- engine quiet... if you use 90-weight oil

- needs minor overhaul... needs engine

- needs major overhaul... Phone the junkyard

- burns no oil... (it all leaks out)

- rebuilt engine... Cleaned the spark plugs.

- Drive it away... I live on a hill.

- Drive it anywhere... (within 10 miles)

- desirable classic... No one wants it.

- rare classic... No one wanted it even when it was new.

- stored 20 years... (in a farmer's field)

- ran when stored... Won't start.

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