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More Jokes

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    Wedding Speech

    Our nephew was getting married to a doctor's daughter. At the wedding reception, the…
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    Late at Walmart

    Charley, a new retiree greeter at Wal-Mart, just couldn't seem to get to work on…
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    Dog License

    During a county-wide drive to round up all unlicensed dogs, a patrolman signaled a car to…
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    Dinner Guests

    The hostess (with a daughter of marriageable age - of long duration) sent out an…
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    Resume Help

    My husband, an auto mechanic, was looking for higher-paying work and asked me to write…
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    Tech Smoke

    A guy rings tech support to report that his computer is faulty.Tech: What's the…
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    Prenatal Visit

    A couple was making their first visit to Dr. Mike Wilson prior to the birth of their…
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    School Notes

    The following notes from parents excusing their children from attending school have been…
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    Flood Prediction

    Meteorological experts predicted a massive flood that would destroy the world.The Pope…
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    --- WARNING, DANGER! ---

    --- WARNING, DANGER! --- I know this guy whose neighbor, a young man, was home recovering…
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    New Flavor?

    The young man entered the Ice Cream Palace and asked, "What kinds of ice cream do you…
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    Mechanic Applicant

    A man is applying for a job as mechanic that he really wants to get.The boss says, "Can…
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    Hurry Home

    It has to be confessed that the minister was rather long-winded. During his sermon a…
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    Frugal - to save

    Mary's fourth grade homework assignment was to make sentences using the words in her…

"Car Names Explained"

(My car is in here so don't be offended if yours is too!)

AUDI - Always Unsafe Designs Implemented

BMW - Big Money Works

Bought My Wife

Brutal Money Waster

Break My Window

BUICK - Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer

CHEVROLET - Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips

Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time

Cheap Heap, Every Valve Rattles, Oil Leaks Every Time

Condition Hopeless, Entire Vehicle Relies On Leftover Engine Technology

DODGE - Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere

Dem Old Dudes Go Everywhere

Dead or Dying Gas Eater

Dear Old Dad's Geriatric Express

FIAT - Failure in Italian Automotive Technology

Fix It All the Time

Fix it again, Tony!

FORD - First On Recall Day

First On Race Day

First On Rust and Deterioration

Fix Or Repair Daily

Found On Road, Dead

Fault Of R&D

Fast Only Rolling Downhill

Found On Russian Dump

GM - General Maintenance

Great Mistake

GMC - Garage Man's Companion

Got A Mechanic Coming?

HONDA - Had One Never Did Again

HYUNDAI - Hope You Understand Nothing's Drivable And Inexpensive...

MAZDA - Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along

OLDSMOBILE - Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Everywhere,

Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover Equipment

PINTO - Put in new transmission often

PONTIAC - poor old Neanderthal thinks it's a Cadillac

SAAB - Send Another Automobile Back

Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown.

TOYOTA - Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto

VOLVO - Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

Vehicles Of Low Velocity Owners

VW - Virtually Worthless

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