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More Jokes

  • car theft

    Car Alarms

    I was with a friend in a cafe' when a noisy car alarm interrupted our conversation. "What…
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    Getting Younger

    Old Sam Johnson goes to his doctor complaining of aches and pains all over his body.…
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    Today I didn't Do It

    One afternoon a man came home from work to find total mayhem in his house. His three…
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    You Know You're Really A Mom When . . .

    You Know You're Really A Mom When . . . 1. You count the sprinkles on each kid's cupcake…
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    Wedding Blessing

    At a wedding ceremony that I was performing, I raised my hand to give the final…
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    Dog Review

    A man follows a woman out of a movie theatre. She has a dog on a leash.He stops her and…
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    How High Is It?

    An Engineering Student, a Physics Student, and a Mathematics student were each given $150…
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    The friars of Flowers (pun alert)

    Some friars were behind in their belfry payments, so they opened a small florist shop to…
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    New Diet

    Needing to shed a few pounds, my husband and I went on a diet that had specific recipes…
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    Goober Farmers

    There were two farmers, neither one had much common sense. They were told by the Forman…
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    Parrot Skills

    A man entered a pet shop, wanting to buy a parrot. The shop owner pointed out three…
  • Picture of a car alarm remote

    Parenting Idea

    I was with a friend in a cafe' when a noisy car alarm interrupted our conversation. "What…
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    Zucchini Sign

    After harvesting the usual bumper crop of squash last year, I took a half-dozen to the…
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    Goober Vacuum

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    Let's Play House

    A little girl and a little boy were at day care one day.The girl approached the boy and…

"Car Names Explained"

(My car is in here so don't be offended if yours is too!)

AUDI - Always Unsafe Designs Implemented

BMW - Big Money Works

Bought My Wife

Brutal Money Waster

Break My Window

BUICK - Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer

CHEVROLET - Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips

Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time

Cheap Heap, Every Valve Rattles, Oil Leaks Every Time

Condition Hopeless, Entire Vehicle Relies On Leftover Engine Technology

DODGE - Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere

Dem Old Dudes Go Everywhere

Dead or Dying Gas Eater

Dear Old Dad's Geriatric Express

FIAT - Failure in Italian Automotive Technology

Fix It All the Time

Fix it again, Tony!

FORD - First On Recall Day

First On Race Day

First On Rust and Deterioration

Fix Or Repair Daily

Found On Road, Dead

Fault Of R&D

Fast Only Rolling Downhill

Found On Russian Dump

GM - General Maintenance

Great Mistake

GMC - Garage Man's Companion

Got A Mechanic Coming?

HONDA - Had One Never Did Again

HYUNDAI - Hope You Understand Nothing's Drivable And Inexpensive...

MAZDA - Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along

OLDSMOBILE - Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Everywhere,

Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover Equipment

PINTO - Put in new transmission often

PONTIAC - poor old Neanderthal thinks it's a Cadillac

SAAB - Send Another Automobile Back

Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown.

TOYOTA - Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto

VOLVO - Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

Vehicles Of Low Velocity Owners

VW - Virtually Worthless

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