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    Bob Hope Quotes

    Some memorable quotes from Bob Hope:ON TURNING 70 "You still chase women, but only…
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    Bump Start

    About five years ago the battery in my beat-up VW Beetle had died because I left the…
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    Beware of Dog

    Upon entering a little country store, the stranger noticed a sign saying "DANGER! BEWARE…
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    Frugal - to save

    Mary's fourth grade homework assignment was to make sentences using the words in her…
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    Wig Eye Witness

    While my friend was working as a receptionist for an eye surgeon, a very angry woman…
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    Alternative Baptism

    As a young preacher, my small church had limited facilities, so we held baptisms in a…
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    Clean Cup

    Bill and Doug went into a diner that looked as though it had seen better days. As they…
  • business timing

    You've Been in Corporate America Too Long When…

    You've Been in Corporate America Too Long When... 1. You ask the waiter what the…
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    Test Crash

    As the test pilot climbed out of the experimental aircraft, having torn off the wings and…
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    Jack's Will

    Jack has died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out Jack's last will…
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    Who Said That?

    If quitters never win, & winners never quit, what fool came up with "Quit while you're…
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    What is This?

    A Rabbi, a Priest and a Salvation Army pastor walk into a bar.The bartender says to them,…
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    Lost and Found

    A police car pulled up in front of grandma Bessie's house, and grandpa got out. The…
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    Kangaroo Fence

    A kangaroo kept getting out of his enclosure at the zoo. Knowing that he could hop high,…

billA corporate executive received a monthly bill from the law firm that was handling a big case for his company. It included hourly billing for conferences, research, phone calls, fax, photocopying, and everything but lunch hours.

Unhappy as he was, the executive knew that the company would have to pay for each of these services.

Then he noticed one item buried in the middle of the list:

"For crossing the street to talk to you, then discovering it wasn't you at all - $125."

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