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    High School Record

    Back at my high school for the tenth reunion, I met my old coach, Mr. Carlier. Walking…
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    Hurry Home

    It has to be confessed that the minister was rather long-winded. During his sermon a…
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    The Toddler Diet

    Americans are always on the lookout for a new diet. The trouble with most diets is that…
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    Positively Wrong

    A linguistics professor was lecturing his class."In English," he explained, "a double…
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    Environ-mental

    My friend Ann and I were eating at a Chinese restaurant. When an elderly waiter set…
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    Caddy Advice

    Standing on the tee of a relatively long par three, a confident golfer said to his caddy,…
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    Self-Evident Truths About Pets

    *Self-Evident Truths About Pets** Although cats are rather delicate creatures, and they…
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    More Signs

    In the front yard of a funeral home, "Drive carefully, we'll wait." On an electrician's…
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    Horse Woes

    Two cowboy friends, Wally and Dallas, each bought a horse one summer. They enjoyed riding…
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    That Line Thing

    If you work with someone like this, you have my condolences. One of our servers crashed.…
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    Letter Pride

    One woman was bragging to her next-door neighbor about her son, a college student. "Why,…
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    Tag Fad

    My teenager was headed to school one morning when I told him that the neck tag on his…
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    Dead Seagull

    A father was at the beach with his children when his four-year-old son ran up to him,…
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    2 Bad Days

    You're NOT having a bad day ... these people had bad days: 1. The average cost of…
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    Bad News From The Doctor

    A man hadn't been feeling well at all, so he went to his doctor for a complete check-up.…

Fresh out of high school, I found a job cleaning the elegant home of an older couple. Among other duties, I had to dust their many imported carvings and petrified collectibles, as well as pick up after their pets.

One day, I was astonished to find two ivory fossils lying on the floor beside the bookcase. I quickly picked them up, and put them back on the shelf. The next week, the same thing happened.

That afternoon, my employer came into the parlor, her faithful dog behind her. Looking around, she eyed the bookcase. "Nya," she asked the dog, "how in the world do you keep getting your bones up there?"

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