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  • guard dog

    Guard Dog

    My sister-in-law, a truck driver, decided to get a dog for protection. As she inspected a…
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    Food, Family and Philosophy

    Gary is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks…
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    Flashlight Defense

    A tourist was being led through the swamps of Florida. "Is it true," he asked, "that an…
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    Cell Phone Find

    An employee of the airport found a cell phone in one of the boarding areas. She switched…
  • man desk

    Car Pool Note

    A man learned shortly before quitting time that he had to attend a meeting. He tried…
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    Worker Ants

    The teacher was giving her class of seven-year-olds a natural history lesson. "Worker…
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    Smile For the DMV

    When I went to get my driver's license renewed, our local motor-vehicle bureau was…
  • painter

    If Airlines Sold Paint

    Customer: Hi. How much is your paint? Clerk: Well, sir, that all depends on quite a lot…
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    Big Date

    A young man called his mother and announced excitedly that he had just met the woman of…
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    Ten Things A Cat Thinks About

    *Ten Things A Cat Thinks About*1. I could have sworn I heard the can opener.2. Is there…
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    Loudest Band

    For two years I managed a group of musicians who proudly labeled themselves "the loudest…
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    Better Preaching

    After the visiting preacher finished, a woman came up and said, "You were much better…
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    Rainy Weather Humor

    Nothing personal against Seattlites - change it to any other place getting a lot of rain.…
  • old lady

    Cast Off

    An elderly lady, who lived on the third floor of a boardinghouse, broke her leg. As the…
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    Face Warning

    Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped…

As a high school football coach, I'm aware that student athletes tend to focus too much on sports. Bob, a fellow coach, was talking about one such player, who called him at home one night.

When his wife informed the kid that Bob wasn't home, he became frantic and said he had to speak to the coach right away.

"Just calm down, and I'll have him call you as soon as he gets home," the coach's wife told him. "What's your number?"

The flustered kid replied, "Three."

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