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More Jokes

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    Signs of E-Mail Addiction

    1. You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop to check your e-mail on the way…
  • fire station

    Fire Test

    Joey and his classmates had just finished a tour of the local fire hall. Before each…
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    $50 Question

    A scientist and a poet were traveling in the same compartment on a train. They had never…
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    Vacation Term Translation

    *Vacation Term Translation*In case any of you are still thinking about picking a vacation…
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    Interpreting Hotel Brochures

    Old world charm ............. No bathTropical .................... RainyMajestic setting…
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    Murphy’s Laws of Parenting

    - The later you stay up, the earlier your child will wake up the next morning. - The…
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    Work Confusion

    A passerby noticed a couple of city workers working along the city sidewalks.The man was…
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    Password Problems

    A new employee calls the Help Desk to complain that there's something wrong with her…
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    Kids' Letters to the President

    Dear Mr. President: How much money does the president make? Could you please write and…
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    Goober Pilots

    Two Goobers (pilots) are trying to land an airplane. They start descending and as they…
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    Dough Boy Drive By

    WANTED FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER (really from the Associated Press) Linda Burnett, 23, was…
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    Political Faith

    Politicians have a constant need to be diplomatic. Witness this candidate for the Senate…
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    Two by Fours

    Man injured by fallen raccoon A couple of goobers in a pickup truck drove into a…
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    Thanks

    A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick up a few things when he noticed an…
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    Jogging Time

    A man had been driving all night and by morning was still far from his destination. He…
Computer One-liners - Part 2

ISDN: I Still Don't kNow

ISDN: Idiot Services you Don't Need

It said, "Insert disk #3," but only two will fit!

Klingon prompt: strike any user when ready.

Manual Writer's Creed: Garbage in, gospel out.

Mental backup in progress - Do Not Disturb!

MIPS: Meaningless Indicator of Processor Speed.

Multitasking - screwing up several things at once.

My computer NEVER cras@#%^TU*NO CARRIER

My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.

Nerd: someone on the Dork Side of the Farce.

Network: anything reticulated or decussated at equal intervals, with interstices between the intersections.

Never trust a computer you can't lift. - Stan Masor

Never trust a computer you can't throw out the window. - S. Hunt

Old programmers never die; they just give up their resources.

One person's error is another person's data.

One picture is worth 128K.

Our system is very reliable. Nothing ever goes wr[}\-_+=~'{?>.(#$%{!`'?;f;fkj;uiutoiun;gt;to;g;g;t

PCMCIA: People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
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