More Jokes

  • Default Image

    Bachelor Cooking

    Two confirmed bachelors sat talking. Their conversation drifted from politics to cooking.…
  • Default Image

    No E-mail (copyrighted??)

    An unemployed man is desperate to support his family. His wife watches TV all day and his…
  • Default Image

    SPCA Rescue

    "Hello, hello?" shrilled a spinsterish voice over the phone. "Is this the SPCA?""Yes.""I…
  • centipede

    Centipede Snack

    A guy was lonely and so he decided life would be more fun if he had a pet. So he went to…
  • pig

    Friendly Pig

    A man was on a walking holiday in a foreign country. He became thirsty so decided to ask…
  • Default Image


    Linda: "What's that you're reading?"Jill: "A diary."Linda: What's in it?Jill: "I can't…
  • Default Image

    Goober at Interview

    The executive was interviewing a young goober for a position in his company. He wanted to…
  • Default Image

    Tech Smoke

    A guy rings tech support to report that his computer is faulty.Tech: What's the…
  • Default Image

    Cheap Motel

    One night at an economy motel, I ordered a 6am wake-up call. The next morning, I awoke…
  • Default Image

    Australian Vacation

    On a vacation to Australia, a Texas farmer meets an Aussie farmer and starts talking to…
  • snake

    Car 34

    A young man is an avid listener to the city's police frequency, and he leaves the scanner…
  • Default Image

    Boss Prepared

    As salesman was assigned to secure an important client but failed in his mission.He faxed…
  • post it_notes

    Passed Note

    A nearsighted minister glanced at the note that Mrs. Jones had sent to him by an usher.…
  • picture of roast meat

    Dinner Guests

    The hostess (with a daughter of marriageable age - of long duration) sent out an…
  • Default Image

    Cake Baking for Mom's of Small Children

    Cake Baking for Mom's of Small Children Preheat oven, get out utensils and ingredients.…
Computer One-liners - Part 2

ISDN: I Still Don't kNow

ISDN: Idiot Services you Don't Need

It said, "Insert disk #3," but only two will fit!

Klingon prompt: strike any user when ready.

Manual Writer's Creed: Garbage in, gospel out.

Mental backup in progress - Do Not Disturb!

MIPS: Meaningless Indicator of Processor Speed.

Multitasking - screwing up several things at once.

My computer NEVER cras@#%^TU*NO CARRIER

My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.

Nerd: someone on the Dork Side of the Farce.

Network: anything reticulated or decussated at equal intervals, with interstices between the intersections.

Never trust a computer you can't lift. - Stan Masor

Never trust a computer you can't throw out the window. - S. Hunt

Old programmers never die; they just give up their resources.

One person's error is another person's data.

One picture is worth 128K.

Our system is very reliable. Nothing ever goes wr[}\-_+=~'{?>.(#$%{!`'?;f;fkj;uiutoiun;gt;to;g;g;t

PCMCIA: People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
Powered By JFBConnect