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More Jokes

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    Have More Fun at Church

    After church on Sunday morning, a young boy suddenly announced to his mother, "Mom, I've…
  • A picture of genetically modified corn

    Genetically Modified Food

    Signs that scientists have gone too far with genetically modified food: *Your hot dog…
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    Corrections

    IMPORTANT NOTICE: If you are one of hundreds of parachuting enthusiasts who bought our…
  • man selling tomatoes joke illustration

    Saved by the Tomato

    A story is told of an unemployed man who is desperate to support his family. His wife…
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    Here Kitty

    Once there was a man named Jim, who let his dog out to pee late one night.He watched some…
  • tortoise

    Holding A Job

    A young man was a very slow worker and subsequently found it difficult to hold down a…
  • purse red

    Purse Contents

    As the bus pulled away, I realized I had left my purse under the seat. Later I called the…
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    Special Message

    "Skipper," the sailor said to his captain as he saluted, "A special message just came in…
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    Cute Nurses

    My nursing colleague was preparing an intravenous line for a 15-year-old male patient.…
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    Bull Healing

    A farmer asked his vet to come out to check on his favorite bull who wasn't doing well at…
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    Resume Examples

    These are real examples from real resumes:*Reasons For Leaving Last Job*- Responsibility…
  • chocolate chip cookies

    Cafeteria Sign

    Children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic school for lunch. At the head of…
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    Comments Never Heard at Church

    1. Hey! It's my turn to sit in the front pew. 2. I was so enthralled, I never noticed…
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    Just A Kiss Per Yard

    Walking up to a department store's fabric counter, a pretty girl asked, "I want to buy…
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    Strange Problem

    A young man, fresh out of college, went to see his doctor one day."Doc, there's something…
Computer One-liners - Part 2

ISDN: I Still Don't kNow

ISDN: Idiot Services you Don't Need

It said, "Insert disk #3," but only two will fit!

Klingon prompt: strike any user when ready.

Manual Writer's Creed: Garbage in, gospel out.

Mental backup in progress - Do Not Disturb!

MIPS: Meaningless Indicator of Processor Speed.

Multitasking - screwing up several things at once.

My computer NEVER cras@#%^TU*NO CARRIER

My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.

Nerd: someone on the Dork Side of the Farce.

Network: anything reticulated or decussated at equal intervals, with interstices between the intersections.

Never trust a computer you can't lift. - Stan Masor

Never trust a computer you can't throw out the window. - S. Hunt

Old programmers never die; they just give up their resources.

One person's error is another person's data.

One picture is worth 128K.

Our system is very reliable. Nothing ever goes wr[}\-_+=~'{?>.(#$%{!`'?;f;fkj;uiutoiun;gt;to;g;g;t

PCMCIA: People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
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