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  • Default Image

    Weight Report

    A small town doctor was famous in the area for always catching large fish.One day while…
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    How High Is It?

    An Engineering Student, a Physics Student, and a Mathematics student were each given $150…
  • Default Image

    Signs That You May Be Canadian

    1. You stand in "line-ups" at the movie, not lines. 2. You understand the phrase, "Could…
  • Default Image

    Tournament Weather`

    Our pastor, an avid golfer, was once taking part in a local tournament. As he was…
  • Default Image

    Out of Fuel

    Cessna: "Newark tower, Cessna 12345, student pilot, I am out of fuel."Tower: "Roger…
  • Default Image

    Out of Gas Options

    The young woman sat in her stalled car, waiting for help. Finally two men walked up to…
  • A Picture of Pastor Tim Davis of Cybersalt

    Pastor Tim as the Dumb Guy

    Three men go on a trip to the desert. One is smart, one is average, and the third is…
  • soap bubbles

    Soap and Water

    A minister was asked to dinner by one of his parishioners, who he knew was an unkempt…
  • Default Image

    Corporate Can-Do

    Programmer to Team Leader:"We can't do this proposed project. **CAN NOT** It will involve…
  • Default Image

    The Buck Stops Where?

    A one-dollar bill met a twenty-dollar bill and said, "Hey, where have you been? I haven't…
  • Default Image

    Great Writer

    There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire become a great writer.…
  • Default Image

    Public Servant Sentence

    "Write a sentence about a public servant," said the teacher. The small boy wrote, "The…
  • Default Image

    Turn Around

    A local priest and pastor were fishing on the side of the road.They thoughtfully made a…
  • dog cat

    Self-Evident Truths about Pets

    * Although cats are rather delicate creatures, and they are subject to a good many…
  • oven temperature guage

    Goober Doubling

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
Computer One-liners - Part 2

ISDN: I Still Don't kNow

ISDN: Idiot Services you Don't Need

It said, "Insert disk #3," but only two will fit!

Klingon prompt: strike any user when ready.

Manual Writer's Creed: Garbage in, gospel out.

Mental backup in progress - Do Not Disturb!

MIPS: Meaningless Indicator of Processor Speed.

Multitasking - screwing up several things at once.

My computer NEVER cras@#%^TU*NO CARRIER

My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.

Nerd: someone on the Dork Side of the Farce.

Network: anything reticulated or decussated at equal intervals, with interstices between the intersections.

Never trust a computer you can't lift. - Stan Masor

Never trust a computer you can't throw out the window. - S. Hunt

Old programmers never die; they just give up their resources.

One person's error is another person's data.

One picture is worth 128K.

Our system is very reliable. Nothing ever goes wr[}\-_+=~'{?>.(#$%{!`'?;f;fkj;uiutoiun;gt;to;g;g;t

PCMCIA: People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
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