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    Dog Driver

    As I drove into a parking lot, I noticed that a pickup truck with a dog sitting behind…
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    The Upper Hand

    A young and foolish pilot wanted to sound cool and show who was boss on the aviation…
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    Computer One-liners - Part 1

    Computer One-liners - Part 1Hard Disk space: the final frontier!Hardware: The parts of a…
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    Do Something Nice

    Unable to attend the funeral after his Uncle Charlie died, a man who lived far away…
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    Swindled

    A newsboy was standing on the corner with a stack of papers, yelling, "Read all about it.…
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    Things Not To Say or Do at a Job Interview

    ** See photo of interviewer's family on desk, point, start laughing uncontrollably.** Ask…
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    Arm Injury

    The brilliant lawyer F. E. Smith once defended a bus driver against claims that his…
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    Yard Sale Anger

    A lady was taking her time browsing through everything at a yard sale and said to the…
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    Shoplifter Excuse

    My friend, the manager of a grocery store, nabbed a shoplifter in the act. He was…
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    Turn Around

    A local priest and pastor were fishing on the side of the road.They thoughtfully made a…
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    Maid Mother

    For all their lives, my three sons have been told they have to do their chores around the…
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    Three Gifts

    Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered. They discussed the gifts they…
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    Goober Travel Times

    A Goober gets on a bus and asks the driver how long the trip is between Limerick and…
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    12 Days of Fastfood

    On the first day of Christmas,My drive through gave to me:A Big Bacon Classic with…
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    Resume Help

    My husband, an auto mechanic, was looking for higher-paying work and asked me to write…
Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.
As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.
COFFEE.EXE missing - Insert Cup and Press Any Key.
Southern DOS: Y'all reckon? (Yep/Nope)
Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster.
Backups! We don' NEED no steenking backups.
4 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2.
E Pluribus Modem
Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes
File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)
Ethernet (n): Something used to catch the Etherbunny
Computers are not intelligent; they only think they are
A main-frame: The biggest PC peripheral available.
My software never has bugs. lt just develops undocumented features.
An error? Impossible! My modem is error-correcting
C:\WINDOWS C:\WINDOWS\GO C:\PC\CRAWL
CONGRESS.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot Washington D.C. (Y/N)?
C:\DOS C:\DOS\RUN RUN\DOS\RUN
<-------- The information went data way
Does fuzzy logic tickle?
Best file compression around- "DEL *.*" = 100% compression
A computer's attention span is as long as its power cord.
The Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.
11th commandment: Covet not thy neighbor's Pentium
BREAKFAST.COM Halted .. Cereal Port Not Responding
The name is Baud, James Baud.
Disinformation is not as good as datinformation.
BUFFERS FILES 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go
Windows: Just another pane in the glass.
Access denied! Nah nah na na nah nah!
Who's General Failure & why is he reading my disk??
C:\Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner!
Ultimate office automation: Net-worked coffee.
Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay!
RAM disk is NOT an installation procedure.
Why doesn't DOS ever say 'EXCELLENT'
Shell to DOS, Come in DOS, do you COPY?
All computers wait at the same speed.
Computer: A device designed to speed and automate errors.
Go ahead, make my data!
Smash forehead on keyboard to continue...
Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue...
ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!
E-mail returned to sender: Insufficient voltage.
Help! I'm modeming... and I can't hang up!!!
All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?
Error! Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.
Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...
Press any key... no, No, NO!! Not THAT one!
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