logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

Computerized Airline

plane-passenger-windowThe world's first fully computerized airliner was ready for its maiden flight without pilots or crew.

The plane taxied to the loading area automatically, its doors opened automatically, the steps came out automatically.

The passengers boarded the plane and took their seats.

The steps retreated automatically, the doors closed, and the airplane taxied toward the runway.

"Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen," a voice intoned.

"Welcome to the debut of the world's first fully computerized airliner. Everything on this aircraft is run electronically. Just sit back and relax. Nothing can go wrong ... nothing can go wrong...nothing can go wrong...."

More Jokes

  • Default Image

    Piedmont Doors

    We got lucky when we heard the old Piedmont Hotel in Atlanta was getting a face-lift and…
  • Default Image

    Cell Phone Find

    An employee of the airport found a cell phone in one of the boarding areas. She switched…
  • Default Image

    Merchant Captain

    One of the world's most famous merchant captains died, having long been admired by his…
  • Default Image

    Tree Faller

    While working as a radiology technician in a hospital emergency room, I took X-rays of a…
  • Default Image

    Put or Putt?

    A teacher was taking her first golf lesson."Is the word spelled 'put' or 'putt'?" she…
  • Default Image

    One-liners

    1. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.2. Make yourself at home! Clean my…
  • Default Image

    Burning Call

    A screenwriter comes home to a burned down house. His sobbing and slightly-singed wife is…
  • Default Image

    Bible Hunt

    One fellow was violently tearing through his Bible in a desperate search when a friend…
  • Default Image

    Hospital Information

    A friend of mine was in the hospital awaiting the arrival of her first child. When I…
  • preacher1

    Board Meeting

    After a long, dry sermon, the minister announced that he wished to meet with the church…
  • beard and_necktie

    Interview Excerpts

    The following, allegedly, are actual post-interview excerpts collected from middle…
  • Default Image

    Eating Worms

    Little Johnny sat playing in the garden. When his mother came out to collect him, she saw…
  • Default Image

    Pillsbury Dough Boy Dead at 71

    Veteran Pillsbury spokesman, Pop N. Fresh, died yesterday of a severe yeast infection. He…
  • Default Image

    Tough Kids

    Three little boys were bragging about how tough they were."I'm so tough", said the first…
  • Default Image

    Stuffed Pockets

    A small boy stunned his parents after church one Sunday when he began to empty his…