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More Jokes

  • her son is a lawyer

    Lawnyer

    When my mother was called for jury duty, she felt confident of her ability to answer the…
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    Sleep Motivation

    An older man is on the operating table awaiting surgery. He has insisted that his son, a…
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    Zoo Trip

    Little Johnny wanted to go to the zoo and pestered his parents for days. Finally his…
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    Getting Older Lines

    Now that I'm older....here's what I've discovered: I STARTED out with nothing....I still…
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    Talking in Your Sleep

    A wife and husband both talked in their sleep. She loved auctions; his hobby was golf.The…
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    I Think Not

    I do not think -- therefore I am not.Here is the illustration of this principle:One…
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    Every Word

    A professor asked a student to remain for a few moments after class. Holding out the…
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    SPCA Rescue

    "Hello, hello?" shrilled a spinsterish voice over the phone. "Is this the SPCA?""Yes.""I…
  • church in the country

    Save Me a Seat

    A friend of mine, and her husband, were on vacation. They visited a church on Sunday. My…
  • suitcases

    No Contraband

    After an overnight flight to meet my father at his latest military assignment, my mother…
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    Kids' Kitchen Terms

    Kids' Kitchen TermsBOIL: The point a parent reaches upon hearing the automatic "Yuck"…
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    Surgery Headache

    A man who had just undergone a very complicated operation kept complaining about a bump…
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    Failing Eyesight

    An older lady was expecting a gentleman friend to call on her later in the day. She was…
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    Fight Lights

    I am a very nervous flyer. During a trip from California to Indiana, it didn't help that…
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    Strangest Recording

    I got the strangest recording when I called the phone company the other day.It said, "You…

This guy had an awful day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day without catching a single one. On his way home, he stopped at the supermarket and ordered four catfish.

He told the fish salesman, "Pick four large ones out and throw them at me, will you?"

"Why do you want me to throw them at you?"

"Because I want to tell my wife that I caught them."

"Okay, but I suggest that you take the orange roughy."

"But why?"

"Because your wife came in earlier today and said that if you came by, I should tell you to take orange roughy. She prefers that for supper tonight."

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