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  • lawn ornaments

    Lawn Ornaments

    Customer at a counter of a lawn ornament shop: "Give me four of those pinwheels, two of…
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    Flying Blind

    One day at a busy airport, the passengers on a commercial airliner are seated, waiting…
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    Babysitting Reference

    We encouraged our 18-year-old daughter to find a job to help pay for her college…
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    Dog Rules

    Basic Rules for Dogs Who Have a Yard To Protect NEWSPAPERS: If you have to go to the…
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    Work Prayer

    Confiding in a co-worker, I told her about a problem in our office and my fear that I…
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    Signs You Are Broke

    1. American Express calls and says: "Leave home without it!" 2. Your idea of a 7-course…
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    Play Quietly

    Donald MacDonald from the Isle of Skye (or maybe it was Neil McNell from Barra, but…
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    Punishment Withheld

    Teacher: " George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also…
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    Parrot Auction

    One day a man went to an auction. While there, he bid on a parrot. He really wanted this…
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    Call to Principal

    The telephone rings in the principal's office at a school. "Hello, this is Dunn…
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    Exercise Program

    Here is an exercise program for those of us whose wisdom exceeds our ambition. The doctor…
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    Fan Help

    Although I have three sons, it was always my daughter who helped me with chores around…
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    Surgery Plan

    We were on our way to the hospital where our 16-year-old daughter was scheduled to…
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    Return Policy

    The store's policy on returns was prominently posted at every register as well as…
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    Driving Worries

    I decided to stop worrying about my teenage son's driving and take advantage of it.I got…
In bygone days, a thin man insulted a large man.  The large man challenged his tormentor to a duel with pistols.

On the day of the duel a debate ensued about the unfair advantage held by the thin man because he was a much smaller target.  Finally the thin man came up with a solution.

"Let the outline of my figure be chalked upon your body," he said to his opponent, "and any shots of mine that hit outside the chalk lines, we won't count."
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