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    18 Things That Never Happened On Star Trek

    *18 Things That Never Happened On Star Trek*1. The Enterprise runs into a mysterious…
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    Lost Ball

    My job as a land surveyor took me to a golf course that was expanding from 9 holes to 18…
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    Goobers In Ditch

    Two Goobers were digging a ditch on a very hot day. One said to the other, "Why are we…
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    Absent Minded Professor

    One of the world's greatest scientists was also recognized as the original absent-minded…
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    Grasshopper in Bar

    A grasshopper goes into a bar and hops on to a barstool to order a drink. The bartender…
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    Looking Funny

    According to statistics, last year over 17 million American families paid a lot of money…
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    Wilderness Trip

    The first carload of Boy Scouts had left my house minutes earlier, bound for our…
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    Fish Fight Story

    Doug was describing a 30-pound bass he'd caught recently, after fighting it for three…
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    Lost Bible

    The devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the…
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    Epitaph Adjustment

    A new widow requested the epitaph "Rest in Peace" for her husband's tombstone. When she…
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    Biblical Spokespersons

    What if Biblical characters could be recruited as high-tech promoters? Consider the…
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    Take Out For Lunch

    Planning a Christmas weekend of entertaining guests, I made a list of things I needed to…
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    Dog Growth

    A distraught dog owner called his vet pleading for an immediate appointment. He explained…
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    Happy Anniversary

    The other day while driving home, after beng delayed at my office, I suddenly saw…
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    The Lord's Prayer - Sort of

    A mother was teaching her three-year-old The Lord's Prayer. For several evenings at…

A small boy is sent to bed by his father.  Five minutes later:

"Da-ad..."

"What?"

"I'm thirsty.  Can you bring me a drink of water?"

"No.  You had your chance.  Lights out."

Five minutes later: "Da-aaaad..."

"WHAT?"

"I'm THIRSTY...Can I have a drink of water??"

"I told you NO!  If you ask again I'll have to spank you!!"

Five minutes later...  "Daaaa-aaaad..."

"WHAT??!!"

"When you come in to spank me, can you bring me a drink of water?"

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