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    Special Delivery

    It was 6 p.m., and I was about to leave the coin laundry where I was employed. My boss…
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    Losing New Balls

    Morris had been playing golf for years. He always used the very finest equipment, but his…
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    Trooper Delivery

    One day a State Trooper was pulling off an expressway near Chicago. When he turned onto…
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    Cake Make Up

    On Coast Guard cutters, low-ranking crewmembers take turns in the galley helping the…
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    Ten Rules for Good Housekeeping

    Ten Rules for Good Housekeeping 1. It is time to clean out the refrigerator when…
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    Bank Enunciation

    Fresh from a visit to the dentist, I decided to stop at my bank. Barely able to…
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    Pull Over

    "Hey you! Pull over!" shouted the traffic cop.The lady complied, and the judge next day…
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    Drag Racing Moped

    A hip young man goes out and buys the best car available: a 2005 Turbo Z123DX. It is the…
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    Breathe

    A lady on a commuter train was reading a newspaper article about life and death…
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    How's My Driving?

    I decided to stop worrying about my teenage son's driving and take advantage of it.I got…
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    Perfect Spouse

    A young lady visited a computer dating service and requested, "I'm looking for a spouse.…
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    Searching For Witnesses

    The policeman arrived at the scene of an accident to find that a car had struck a…
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    Wedding Report

    "How did the wedding go?" asked the preacher's wife."Just fine until I asked the bride if…
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    A Hi-Tech Litmus Test

    This morning, on the church newsletter were these instructions:Hold this paper close to…
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    You Know You're in Trouble When

    You know you'rein trouble when ... Your accountant's letter of resignation is postmarked…
Dear Abby, I have a man I never could trust. He cheats so much on me I'm not even sure this baby I'm carrying is his.

Dear Abby, I am a twenty-three year old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It's getting expensive and I think my boyfriend should share half the cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.

Dear Abby, I suspected that my husband had been fooling around, and when I confronted him with the evidence he denied everything and said it would never happen again.

Dear Abby, Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own?

Dear Abby, I joined the Navy to see the world. I've seen it. Now how do I get out?

Dear Abby, I was married to Bill for three months and I didn't know he drank until one night he came home sober.

Dear Abby, My forty-year-old son has been paying a psychiatrist $50 an hour every week for two-and-a-half years. He must be crazy.

Dear Abby, My mother is mean and short-tempered. I think she is going through her mental pause.

Dear Abby, Our son was married in January. Five months later his wife had a ten-pound baby girl. They said the baby was premature. Tell me, can a baby this big be that early? Signed, Wondering.
Dear Wondering. The baby was on time, the wedding was late. Forget it.

Dear Abby, I have always wanted to have my family history traced, but I can't afford to spend a lot of money to do it. Any suggestions? Signed, Sam Dear Sam, Yes. Run for public office.

Dear Abby, I am forty-four years old and I would like to meet a man my age with no bad habits. Signed, Rose Dear Rose, So would I.
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