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More Jokes

  • face stressed

    You Know You're in Trouble When

    You know you'rein trouble when ... Your accountant's letter of resignation is postmarked…
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    Don't Smoke

    A couple of hours into a visit with my mother, she noticed I hadn't once lit up a…
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    Audi Alteram Parten

    During a Law course class, the 'Audi Alteram Parten' rule was explained. Translated it…
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    Sleep Motivation

    An older man is on the operating table awaiting surgery. He has insisted that his son, a…
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    Spelling Code

    A client called to report an accident and ask if her insurance rates would go up."Our…
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    Sarahella

    After watching the movie Cinderella, five-year-old Sarah started using her pinwheel as a…
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    Gym Oops

    New to the United States, I was eager to meet people. So one day I struck up a…
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    GOLF, n.

    [1] a game that consists of a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad…
  • When luggage goes missing.

    Home For The Holidays

    A student was heading home for the holidays. When she got to the airline counter, she…
  • A joke about two hunters lost in the forest.

    Lost Goober Hunters

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one here. My uncle Joe and…
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    Mess Sign

    A sign posted on the wall of an Army mess read, "Don't Waste Food -- Food will win the…
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    Changing Plates

    My friend called his car insurance company to tell them to change his address from Texas…
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    Shhhhhh!

    A father had three very active boys. One summer evening, he was playing cops and robbers…
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    Moon Cheese

    For centuries, people thought the moon was made of green cheese.Then the astronauts found…
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    Flu Prayer

    A young boy called the pastor of a local "corner" church to ask the pastor to come by to…

Dear Milkman...

"Dear Milkman, I've just had a baby, please leave another one."

"Please leave an extra pint of paralyzed milk."

"Please don't leave any more milk. All they do is drink it"

"Milkman please close the gate behind you because the birds keep pecking the tops off the milk."

"Sorry not to have paid your bill before, but my wife had a baby and I've been carrying it around in my pocket for weeks."

"Sorry about yesterday's note. I didn't mean one egg and a dozen pints, but the other way round."

"When you leave my milk knock on my bedroom window and wake me because I want you 'to give me a hand to turn the mattress."

My daughter says she wants a milkshake. Do you do it before you deliver or do I have to shake the bottle."

"Please send me a form for cheap milk, for I have a baby two months old and did not know about it until a neighbor told me."

"Milk is needed for the baby. Father is unable to supply it."

"From now on please leave two pints every other day and one pint on the days in between, except Wednesdays and Saturdays when I don't want any milk."

My back door is open. Please put milk in 'fridge, get money out of cup in drawer and leave change on kitchen table, because we want to play bingo tonight."

"Please leave no milk today. When I say today, I mean tomorrow, for I wrote this note yesterday or is it today?"

"When you come with the milk please put the coal on the boiler, let dog out and put newspaper inside the screen door. PS. Don't leave any milk."

"No milk. Please do not leave milk at No. 14 either as he is dead until further notice."

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