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More Jokes

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    Orchestra Note

    While a famous orchestra was on tour, the conductor found this note under his hotel room…
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    Oversensitive Reply

    I was having trouble with the idea of turning 30 and was oversensitive to any signs of…
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    Refined Shopping

    A very refined young man comes to a small food shop and sees fruit. "Give me two…
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    Tree Faller

    While working as a radiology technician in a hospital emergency room, I took X-rays of a…
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    Positive Start

    How to start your day with a positive outlook.1. Open a new file in your PC.2. Name it…
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    County Employees

    A fellow stopped at a rural gas station, filled his tank, and took a break by his car…
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    Cast Your Bread

    My mom, a difficult independent, likes sitting by the park feeding the pigeons. One day…
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    Murphy's Laws of Law Enforcement

    New uniforms and ties attract catsup and gravy.You will never get the urge to use the…
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    Celebrating The Raise

    My sister landed a good job with an accounting firm, and after a while she got a generous…
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    Actual Church Signs

    Reported to be actual church signs.... 1. Free Trip to heaven. Details inside! 2. Try our…
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    Dangling Participles

    Dangling Participle Alert!~ The burglar was about 30 years old, white, 5' 10", with wavy…
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    Bathroom Break

    On the first day of school, about mid-morning, the kindergarten teacher said, "If anyone…
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    Pit Falls

    This particular man was taking a shortcut through the graveyard one dark night. That was…
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    Work Virus

    There is a new virus going around, called "work". If you receive any sort of "work" at…
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    Baseball Doctor

    As the manager of our hospital's softball team, I was responsible for returning equipment…

ADULT:
A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

BEAUTY PARLOR:
A place where women curl up and dye.

CANNIBAL:
Someone who is fed up with people.

CHICKENS:
The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE:
A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST:
Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST:
Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

GOSSIPER:
A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage.

HANDKERCHIEF:
Cold Storage.

INFLATION:
Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

MYTH:
A female moth.

RAISIN:
Grape with a sunburn.

SECRET:
Something you tell to one person at a time.

TOOTHACHE:
The pain that drives you to extraction.

TOMORROW:
One of the greatest labour saving devices of today.

YAWN:
An honest opinion openly expressed.

WRINKLES:
Something other people have.  You have character lines.

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