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More Jokes

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    Never Be Late

    A local priest was being honored at his retirement dinner after 25 years in the parish. A…
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    Lawyer Questions

    The following questions from lawyers (and answers from witnesses) were taken from…
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    New Car

    The first Sunday after my husband and I bought a new car, we parked it in the last row of…
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    More Oneliners

    I can see clearly now, the brain is gone... Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay. Madness…
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    Party Advice

    A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly…
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    Goober Dieter

    A goober was terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet. "I want you to eat…
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    How To Train A Cat

    Our young daughter had adopted a stray cat. To my distress, he began to use the back of…
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    Record Store

    A woman meant to call a record store, but dialed the wrong number and got a private home…
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    Baby Wrap

    Part of my job as a public-health nurse is teaching new parents how to care for their…
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    Campaign Funding

    Can you believe a candidate dropped out of the race because of a lack of campaign funds?…
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    "Not" Working

    Dear Secretary of Agriculture, My friends, Darryl and Janice, over at Jonestown,…
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    Fore!

    My five-year-old nephew wanted to caddy for my brother's golf game. "You have to count my…
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    Testimony Night

    It was testimony night in the church. A lady got up and said, "We are living in a wicked…
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    Silly Q&A

    Did you hear about the guy that lost his left arm and leg in a car crash?He's all right…
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    The Politician Dance

    There was a dance teacher who talked of a very old dance called the Politician. "All you…

There was an unexpected knock on my door, and like I always do I first opened the peephole and asked, "Who's there?"

"Parcel post, ma'am. I have a package that needs a signature."

"Where's the package?" I asked suspiciously. The deliveryman held it up.

"Could I see some ID?" I said, still not convinced.

"Lady," he replied wearily, "if I wanted to break into your house, I'd probably just use these." And he pulled out the keys I had left in the door.

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