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    New Neighbor

    My quiet Saturday morning ended abruptly when my 12-year-old son, Billy, and one of his…
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    Newborn Utterance

    The birth of our second child, a daughter, came after a long and difficult labor. But it…
  • police pull over

    Pull Over Cookies

    Returning from a trip to visit my grandmother in Canada, I was stopped by a state trooper…
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    Husband's Estimate

    Joe's wife bought a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look years…
  • boy sitting

    3rd Grader's Explanation of God

    Written by Danny Dutton, age 8, from Chula Vista, California, for his third grade…
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    Rules for Editing

    Some of you have noticed a few typos in the CleanLaugh list now and then. To improve this…
  • woman3

    Musings

    * A bus station is where a bus stops.A train station is where a train stops.My desk is my…
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    Time To Wave

    From a passenger ship, everyone can see a bearded man on a small island who is shouting…
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    $100 Coffee

    A street person approached a passer-by and said, "Sir, would you give me $100 for a cup…
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    Muffin Moving

    After living in our house for four years, we were moving out of state. My husband had…
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    Instructions for Microsoft's New TV Dinner

    You must first remove the plastic cover. By doing so you agree to accept and honour…
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    Quarter Rush

    On a busy Friday night at the restaurant where I'd recently started waiting tables, the…
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    Every Word

    A professor asked a student to remain for a few moments after class. Holding out the…
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    The Upper Hand

    A young and foolish pilot wanted to sound cool and show who was boss on the aviation…
  • Tourist asks cabbie if Israel is really a healthy country.

    Healthy Tourism

    Mr. Peterson, a tourist from Toronto, arrived in Israel. In an airport taxi cab, Peterson…

picture of project documents*Dictionary of Project Terms*

Project slightly behind original schedule due to unforeseen difficulties -- We got so sick of working on this that we decided to do something else.

Major Technological Breakthrough -- Back to the drawing board.

Developed after years of intensive research -- It was discovered by accident.

Customer satisfaction is believed assured -- We are so far behind schedule that the customer will be happy to get anything at all from us.

The design will be finalized in the next reporting period -- We haven't started this job yet, but we've got to say something.

Test results were extremely gratifying -- It works, and are we surprised.

Extensive effort is being applied on a fresh approach to the problem -- We just hired three new guys; we'll let them kick it around for a while.

Preliminary operational tests are inconclusive -- The darn thing blew up when we threw the switch.

The entire concept will have to be abandoned -- The only guy who understood the thing quit.

Modifications are under way to correct certain minor difficulties -- We threw the whole thing out and are starting from scratch.

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