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More Jokes

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    Goober Skydiver

    If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one…
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    More Cute Kids

    On vacation with her family in Montana, a mother drove her van past a church in a small…
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    "Dilbert Quote" Contest

    A magazine recently ran a "Dilbert Quotes" contest. They were looking for people to…
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    The Foot Rule

    There is a formula for figuring out how bed space is allocated. It is called the "Foot…
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    Pulpit Humor

    There was this Lutheran minister who served a predominately German congregation for…
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    Shades of Tanning

    Before going on vacation, I went to a tanning salon. I was under the lights so long that…
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    Carrier Landings 2

    Flying into a Middle East airport, my co-pilot and I reviewed our flight plan for the…
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    Market Conditions

    The stockbroker's secretary answered his phone one morning. "I'm sorry," she said, "Mr.…
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    What Am I?

    Miss Jones had been giving her second-grade students a lesson on science. She had…
  • picture of hurricane evacuation sign route

    Florida Hurricane Advice

    We're about to enter the peak of the hurricane season. Any day now, you're going to turn…
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    The Big Sale

    It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale and an advertisement in the local…
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    Cowboy's Guide to Life

    Don't squat with your spurs on. Don't interfere with something that ain't botherin' you…
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    Signs You Are an Elementary School Teacher

    You are probably an elementary school teacher if:~ You ask guests if they have remembered…
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    Getting Ready

    A man pacing back and forth glanced at his watch and yelled upstairs to his wife, "Honey,…
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    Speech Flirt

    During a conference, I was pleasantly surprised to be seated next to a very handsome man.…

"Some days you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant."
- Unknown

"Whoever said you can't buy happiness forgot about puppies."
- Gene Hill

"Outside of a dog, a book is probably man's best friend; inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
- Groucho Marx

"To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs."
- Aldous Huxley

"A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down."
- Robert Benchley

"Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in?  I think that's how dogs spend their lives."
- Sue Murphy

"I loathe people who keep dogs.  They are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves."
- August Strindberg

"My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents a can. That's almost $7.00 in dog money."
- Joe Weinstein

"Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful."
- Ann Landers

"Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea."
- Robert A.  Heinlein

"In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him."
- Dereke Bruce, Taipei, Taiwan

"There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face."
- Ben Williams

"When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem."
- Edward Abbey

"Cat's motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it."
- Unknown

"Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail."
- Unknown

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