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    Fly Problem

    My husband is a doctor, and he received an emergency call from a patient. She had a fly…
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    Delete Button

    Unfortunately, we humans do not come equipped with delete buttons for our mouths.My…
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    Dog Meters

    Two dogs out and about, walk over to a parking meter.One says to the other, "How do you…
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    Daaaad!

    A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later:"Da-ad...""What?""I'm…
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    Dun in Texas

    A cowboy (named Julius?) rode into town and stopped at the saloon for a drink.…
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    The Student Mind During Final Exams

    Contents of The Student Mind During Final Exams 10% The prof. never covered this section!…
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    Hypo Teen

    Our neighbor used the word hypochondriac to describe the phase her teen-age daughter was…
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    Busted

    He was a young Pastor and as usual the enemy would try to stir up trouble in the family…
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    Kids on Marriage

    Kids on marriage.... How Does a Person Decide Who to Marry?******- "You flip a nickel,…
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    Hymns For The Aging

    *Hymns for the Aging* Precious Lord, Take my Hand (And Help Me Get Up) It is Well with My…
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    A Job Worse Than Yours

    The San Francisco Zoo has an elephant named Calle who has a chronic illness, requiring…
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    Two Plus Two

    A mathematician, a statistician and an accountant apply for the same job. The interviewer…
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    You've Had Too Much Coffee When

    You've had too much coffee when: 1. You ski uphill. 2. You get a speeding ticket even…
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    Waking Up Grumpy

    A marriage counsellor was attempting to find out something about his patient's attitude…
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    Feeding Shamu

    At Sea World, our grandson absolutely refused to see the show featuring Shamu the killer…

"Some days you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant."
- Unknown

"Whoever said you can't buy happiness forgot about puppies."
- Gene Hill

"Outside of a dog, a book is probably man's best friend; inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
- Groucho Marx

"To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs."
- Aldous Huxley

"A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down."
- Robert Benchley

"Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in?  I think that's how dogs spend their lives."
- Sue Murphy

"I loathe people who keep dogs.  They are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves."
- August Strindberg

"My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents a can. That's almost $7.00 in dog money."
- Joe Weinstein

"Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful."
- Ann Landers

"Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea."
- Robert A.  Heinlein

"In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him."
- Dereke Bruce, Taipei, Taiwan

"There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face."
- Ben Williams

"When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem."
- Edward Abbey

"Cat's motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it."
- Unknown

"Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail."
- Unknown

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