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  • snails

    Turtle Accident

    Two snails were standing on the side of the road, a turtle stopped and said, "Do you guys…
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    Famous Last Words

    * Don't turn it on yet, it's not quite ready.* Step back a bit, I can't get you in the…
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    Encyclopaedia Set for Sale

    FOR SALE BY OWNER Complete set of Encyclopaedia Britannica.Excellent Condition.$1200 or…
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    You Know You're Really A Mom When . . .

    You Know You're Really A Mom When . . . 1. You count the sprinkles on each kid's cupcake…
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    The Littlest Informant

    As a recently divorced police officer, and new to the dating scene, I was thrilled but…
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    Flight Delay Announcement

    A passenger on a Southwest flight says that he once faced a flight delay just before they…
  • cooking

    Cooking Terms

    Tongue: A variety of meat, rarely served because it clearly crosses the line between a…
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    Stone's Throw

    A vacationer e-mailed a seaside hotel to ask its location."It's only a stone's throw away…
  • A picture of the Grand Canyon

    Questions Asked at National Parks

    *Questions Asked at National Parks* *Everglades National Park:*Are the alligators…
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    Mirror Honesty

    A husband and wife are getting ready for bed. The wife is standing in front of a full…
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    You Know You're Getting Old When

    You know you're getting there when... Everything that works hurts, and what doesn't hurt…
  • chocolate1

    Chocolate Calories

    A good piece of chocolate has about 200 calories. As I enjoy 2 servings per night, and a…
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    What's Wrong Now?

    My friend, an ex-Marine Aviator wanted to show off his new twin-engine plane. I was…
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    Call To Mom

    A man called his mother in Florida. "Mom, how are you?" "Not too good," said the mother.…
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    I'm Not Old - I'm Just Mature

    I'M NOT OLD...JUST MATUREToday at the drugstore, the clerk was a gent.From my purchase…

store signA woman walks into a convenience store. She walks straight to the manager and asks, "Do you have any small notebooks?"

"Sorry," says the manager. "We're all out."

The woman shrugs, and asks, "Well, do you have any mechanical pencils?"

"Nope, don't have that either," says the manager.

The woman feels her stomach rumbling and asks, "Do you have Doritos? Nachos?"

The manager shrugs, "Sorry."

"Hmmph. How about Chapstick?" says the woman.

"Nope. Don't have that."

"Well" the woman says, "If you don't have anything, why don't you close the store?"

The manager shrugs, "Can't. Don't have the key."

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