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    Wire Guard

    Gale-force winds and frigid temperatures had taken their toll. Snapped electric wires…
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    What He Says - What He Means

    What He Says - What He Means"I'm going fishing."Really means: "I'm going to stand by a…
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    The Magician and The Parrot

    A magician was working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean. The audience would be different…
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    Passing Time

    My husband and I both look very young for our ages. In fact, we've hardly aged a day…
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    Student Driver

    As an instructor in driver education at Unionville-Sebewaing Area High School in…
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    Sayings About Aging

    Thoughts on Growing Old ~ Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else…
  • picture of a hot pepper

    Pepper Advice

    When chopping a hot pepper... 1. Do NOT rub your nose... and if you do and it starts to…
  • chef bad

    You Know You Are a Bad Cook When…

    - You use the smoke alarm as a cooking timer. - You consider it a culinary success if the…
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    Soft Seven

    A young man is paired up with a priest on the first hole at the golf course. When they…
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    Family Support

    The prospective father-in-law asked, "Young man, can you support a family?” The surprised…
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    Exercise

    - I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing.- I…
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    Missing Car Parts

    A goober calls 911 on her cell phone to report that her car has been broken into. She is…
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    Perley Moore Buys a Truck

    There was a farmer, Perley Moore, who had recently bought a truck and found that the…
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    Grandma's Meat Loaf

    A recent bride called her mother one evening in tears. "Oh, Mom, I tried to make…
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    Bike Training

    Never having learned to ride a bicycle as a child, I finally decided to do it in my late…

sky scraperSoon after our high-tech company moved into a new building, we had trouble with the elevators. A manager got stuck between floors and, after some door banging, finally attracted attention. His name was taken and rescue promised.

It took two hours before the elevator mechanic arrived and got the manager out. When he returned to his desk, he found this note from his efficient secretary: "The elevator people called and will be here in two hours."

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