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More Jokes

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    Cheap Suit

    The fellow was being sold a very cheap suit. "But the left arm is a lot longer than the…
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    Bumper Stickers

    If You Can Read This, I Can Slam On My Brakes And Sue You Forget World Peace -- Visualize…
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    Toy Advice

    A woman, on meeting a psychologist at a party, made a pitch for some free professional…
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    Movie Breakout

    A fellow took his girlfriend to the movies. During the previews, she asked him if he…
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    Punishment

    An irritated father complained to his golf buddy. "When I was a kid, my parents sent me…
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    General Motors Help Line

    General Motors doesn't have a help line for people who don't know how to drive, because…
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    Bunch Of Laughs

    Over the massive front doors of a church, these words were inscribed: The Gate of…
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    Friendly Golf

    Two friends were beginning a game of golf.The first man stepped up to the tee, hit the…
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    Wacky Warnings

    Here are the top five winning entries in the Wacky Warning Labels contest, sponsored by…
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    Future Price of Roses

    The young man ahead of my father at the flower shop was taking an unusually long time to…
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    Cow Predictions

    A midwest farmer was describing his lifestyle to a touring group of city folks. "One of…
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    Golf Friendless

    "Bob, why don't you play golf with John anymore?" asked a friend."Would you play golf…
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    Paying For The Damage

    A motorist driving by a Texas ranch hit and killed a calf that was crossing the road. The…
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    Macho Dude

    A young man visiting a dude ranch wanted to be "Macho", and went out walking with one of…
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    Vacation Offer

    A newspaper writer, after working for 17 long years, was finally granted two months…

*Elf Pet Peeves*

7. Toil for 364 days a year just to make children smile and no one gives a rip. Meanwhile, frolic around one day in some stupid outfit in February with a lousy bow and arrow and all of a sudden you're a hero.

6. Company health plan doesn't cover tattoo removal.

5. The EPA's new relaxed reindeer-emissions standards.

4. Icy cold North Pole temperature makes it hard to produce quality workmanship.

3. Reindeer game #12: Elf lacrosse.

2. Constantly ridiculed for that 0-854 record in the North Pole basketball league.

1. Jolly Ole Santa has never yet brought back a single cookie to share.

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