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More Jokes

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    Lost Over Washington State

    A helicopter was flying around above Washington State yesterday when an electrical…
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    Inspector Mom

    Have you noticed anything fishy about the inspection teams who have arrived in Iraq?…
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    Thai This For a Change

    An elderly couple, Marty and Helen, along with some friends agreed to try a Thai…
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    Professor Turns Plumber

    A professor of mathematics noticed that his kitchen sink at his home leaked. He called a…
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    Toilet Repair

    Because I couldn't unplug the toilet with a plunger, I had to dismantle the entire…
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    Charity Answer

    Father O'Shea, the parish priest in the village, was giving a sermon about charity. He…
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    Goober Travel Times

    A Goober gets on a bus and asks the driver how long the trip is between Limerick and…
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    Out Of Step

    As he was drilling a batch of recruits, the sergeant saw that one of them was marching…
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    Go Get Grandma

    When I stopped the bus to pick up Chris for preschool, I noticed an older woman hugging…
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    In My Day

    A young man who was also an avid golfer found himself with a few hours to spare one…
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    2503 Years Old

    A tourist is traveling with a guide through one of the thickest jungles in Latin America,…
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    Tea Service

    One day my mother was out and my dad was in charge of me and my brother who is four years…
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    Dewey Check

    I walked into my sister's kitchen and found my nephew, Dewey, having a snack."Where's…
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    Bad Flight

    While ferrying workers back and forth from an offshore oil rig, the helicopter lost power…
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    Phone Calls

    Caller: I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff, please. Operator: I'm…

*Elf Pet Peeves*

7. Toil for 364 days a year just to make children smile and no one gives a rip. Meanwhile, frolic around one day in some stupid outfit in February with a lousy bow and arrow and all of a sudden you're a hero.

6. Company health plan doesn't cover tattoo removal.

5. The EPA's new relaxed reindeer-emissions standards.

4. Icy cold North Pole temperature makes it hard to produce quality workmanship.

3. Reindeer game #12: Elf lacrosse.

2. Constantly ridiculed for that 0-854 record in the North Pole basketball league.

1. Jolly Ole Santa has never yet brought back a single cookie to share.

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