logo

sign-up-for-free-cybersalt-today-button

More Jokes

  • police pull over

    Pull Over Cookies

    Returning from a trip to visit my grandmother in Canada, I was stopped by a state trooper…
  • picture of pretzel

    Pretzel Charity

    A little old lady sold pretzels on a street corner for 25 cents each. Every day a young…
  • Default Image

    Grandpa And The Computer

    *Grandpa And The Computer*The computer swallowed GrandpaYes honestly, its true.He pressed…
  • ambulance

    Does That Hurt

    We live in a small town where we have a volunteer Ambulance Corp. We are blessed with…
  • Default Image

    Baby Talk

    What your baby would tell you if he could talk:1. I have my blankie, you have your…
  • Default Image

    Special Delivery

    It was 6 p.m., and I was about to leave the coin laundry where I was employed. My boss…
  • Default Image

    Canadian University Light-Bulb Jokes

    Enough here for many to laugh at themselves. CANADIAN UNIVERSITY LIGHT-BULB JOKES How…
  • Default Image

    Keeping Warm

    (switch this one around to suit your favourite/favorite make) Chevy has added wires to…
  • Default Image

    Rolls-Royce Loaner

    When I arrived at a friend's home for a party, my old rattletrap looked pretty shabby…
  • Default Image

    Notice

    PLEASE NOTICE:You may have noticed the increased amount of notices for you to notice.…
  • new years_eve

    Attainable New Year's Resolutions

    This year, I resolve to... - Gain weight; at least 30 pounds. - Stop exercising; waste of…
  • Default Image

    Airport Mistletoe

    It was the beginning of December. The trip had gone reasonably well, and he was ready to…
  • face surprised

    Family Feud Answers

    *Here are some actual answers from contestants who have appeared on the game show Family…
  • picture of seeing eye dog

    Can You See Me?

    I'm a counselor who helps coordinate support groups for visually-impaired adults. Many…
  • child happy

    Children's Attempts at Hymns

    *Children's Attempts at Singing Well Known Hymns* Sometimes kids get things a…

man headphones~ I can't come in to work today because I'll be stalking my previous boss, who fired me for not showing up for work. Okay?

~ I have a rare case of 48-hour projectile leprosy, but I know we have that deadline to meet...

~ I am stuck in the blood pressure machine down at the Food Giant.

~ Yes, I seem to have contracted some attention-deficit disorder and, hey, how about them Skins, huh? So, I won't be able to, yes, could I help you? No, no, I'll be sticking with Sprint, but thank you for calling.

~ I just found out that I was switched at birth. Legally, I shouldn't come to work knowing my employee records may now contain false information.

~ The psychiatrist said it was an excellent session. He even gave me this jaw restraint so I won't bite things when I'm startled.

~ The dog ate my car keys. We're going to hitchhike to the vet.

~ I prefer to remain an enigma.

~ I can't come to work today because the EPA has determined that my house is completely surrounded by wetlands and I have to arrange for helicopter transportation.

~ I am converting my calendar from Julian to Gregorian.

~ I am extremely sensitive to a rise in the interest rates.

~ I refuse to travel to my job until there is a commuter tax. I insist on paying my fair share.

~ I've used up all my sick days...so I'm calling in dead!

~ I set half the clocks in my house ahead an hour and the other half back an hour Saturday and spent 18 hours in some kind of space-time continuum loop, reliving Sunday (right up until the explosion). I was able to exit the loop only by reversing the polarity of the power source exactly e*log(pi) clocks in the house while simultaneously rapping my dog on the snout with a rolled up Times. Accordingly, I will be in late, or early.

Powered By JFBConnect