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More Jokes

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    Give It A Try

    Think of a letter between A and W. Repeat it out loud as you scroll down. Keep going!…
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    Kitchen Cry

    Howard came home from work one evening and there was his wife Miriam in the kitchen…
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    Why ask Why?

    Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive? Why…
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    Omitted Stories

    Reverend Smith, a respected church leader, arrived in a large city to deliver a series of…
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    Coffee Vending Machine

    A man put his fifty cents in a vending machine and watched helplessly while the cup…
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    Landing Request

    There's a story about the military pilot calling for a priority landing because his…
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    Carry A Flashlight

    A New York boy was being led through the swamps of Louisiana by his cousin."Is it true…
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    Flight Booking

    After booking my 80-year-old grandmother on a flight from Florida to Nevada, I called the…
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    Tech Smoke

    A guy rings tech support to report that his computer is faulty.Tech: What's the…
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    Haiku Error Messages

    Sony has announced its own computer operating system now available on its hot new…
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    The Difference Between Men and Women

    This is a Dave Barry item. Do not use in your book.********** Let's say a guy named Fred…
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    Workin' on the Railroad

    Benny wanted a job as a signalman on the railways. At his interview, the inspector asked…
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    Wallpaper Jobs

    Joan decided to redecorate. She wasn't sure how many rolls of wallpaper she would need…
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    Fee Surprise

    Two brawny men came to my house to install some new floor covering in the kitchen. Once…
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    Fishing Trip

    "So, what's the matter? I thought you just got back from a nice relaxing fishing trip…

- I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing.

- I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

- I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

- The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.

- If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.

- Walking can add minutes to your life. This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $5000 per month.

- My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. Now she's 97 years old and we don't know where on earth she is.

- The only reason I would take up exercising is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

- I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to go there.

- And last but not least: I don't exercise because it makes the ice jump right out of my glass.

- You could run this over to your friends but why not just e-mail it to them!

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