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    Change Help

    A kind-hearted motorist saw a man struggling to change a tire alongside the highway, and…
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    Why Dogs Can't Use Computers

    *Why Dogs Can't Use Computers*10. He's distracted by cats chasing his mouse.9. SIT and…
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    The Perfect Worker

    From a reference letter . . . 1 Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found2…
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    Tree Faller

    While working as a radiology technician in a hospital emergency room, I took X-rays of a…
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    Thoughts on Golfing

    A "gimme" can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers, neither of whom can…
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    Golf Comeback

    (This joke is based on an actual event which is a part of golf lore around the world). A…
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    The Gas Men

    Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out…
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    How Do You Spell That

    Lena passed away and Ole called 911. The 911 operator told Ole that she would send…
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    Advertising Terms Explained

    *Advertising Terms Explained*NEW - Different color from previous design.ALL NEW - Parts…
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    Ring Appraisal

    An acquaintance of mine whose daughter was about to be married decided to give her a…
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    Remember When

    An old couple is sitting in their living room when the old woman leans over and says to…
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    Four Letter Surgery

    Jerry is recovering from day surgery when a nurse asks him how he is feeling."I'm ok but…
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    Arguing

    The other day, Nancy and I got into some petty argument. (I say it was petty. She would…
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    Strange 911 Calls

    *Strange 911 Calls*A call came into 911 Emergency because two couples were going to share…
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    Gnashing of Teeth

    A preacher of the old school was describing the events of Judgement Day and, of course,…

- I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing.

- I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

- I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

- The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.

- If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.

- Walking can add minutes to your life. This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $5000 per month.

- My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. Now she's 97 years old and we don't know where on earth she is.

- The only reason I would take up exercising is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

- I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to go there.

- And last but not least: I don't exercise because it makes the ice jump right out of my glass.

- You could run this over to your friends but why not just e-mail it to them!

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