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More Jokes

  • school-house

    Beginning School

    Tommy had reached school age. His mother managed with a blast of propaganda to make him…
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    Bible Answer

    A father was approached by his small son, who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible…
  • picture of elderly couple

    Sharing

    Uncle Sid and Aunt Sadie are in their eighties and have been married for more than sixty…
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    Efficiency

    An efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution. "You don't want to try…
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    Actual Newspaper Headlines (collected by journalists)

    1. Something Went Wrong In Jet Crash, Expert Says2. Police Begin Campaign To Run Down…
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    Newborn Utterance

    The birth of our second child, a daughter, came after a long and difficult labor. But it…
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    Typo Apology

    "We apologize for the error in the last edition, in which we stated that 'Mr Fred Nicolme…
  • Trojan Virus Warning

    Trojan Virus Warning

    Hey Hector, This was forwarded to me by Cassandra - it looks legit. Please distribute to…
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    Talking in Your Sleep

    A wife and husband both talked in their sleep. She loved auctions; his hobby was golf.The…
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    Vet Visit

    In his younger days our golden retriever Catcher often ran away when he had the chance.…
  • classroom

    Piranha Spell

    While my third-grade class was completing a writing exercise, one of the students asked…
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    Coach Call

    As a high school football coach, I'm aware that student athletes tend to focus too much…
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    Card Reader Instructions

    Hard to believe, but many of our customers at the bank still don't know how to swipe…
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    ATM Correction

    My father began teaching business classes at the local prison through a community…
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    True Calls to the IRS

    True Calls to the IRSCaller: I want to know if I should file married or single.IRS: Are…

Here is an exercise program for those of us whose wisdom exceeds our ambition. The doctor told me "Physical exercise is good for you." I know that I should do it, but my body is out of shape, so I have worked out this easy daily program I can do anywhere. If I can do it, you can do this, too.

Monday:

Beat around the bush.

Jump to conclusions.

Climb the walls.

Wade through paperwork.

Tuesday:

Drag my heels.

Push my luck.

Make mountains out of molehills.

Hit the nail on the head.

Wednesday:

Bend over backwards.

Jump on the bandwagon.

Balance the books.

Run around in circles.

Thursday:

Toot my own horn.

Climb the ladder of success.

Pull out the stops.

Add fuel to the fire.

Friday:

Open a can of worms.

Put my foot in my mouth.

Start the ball rolling.

Go over the edge.

Saturday:

Pick up the pieces.

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