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    With Friends Like That...

    A group of friends went deer hunting and paired off in two's for the day. That night one…
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    Never Too Old

    Two elderly gentlemen were visiting. "I guess you're never too old," the first one…
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    New and Approved

    The little girl was sitting in her grandfather's lap as he read her a goodnight story.…
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    After Me

    "I have to have a raise," the man said to his boss. "Three companies are after me." "Is…
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    Computer T-Shirt Slogans - #2

    C:\DOS C:\DOS\RUN RUN\DOS\RUN
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    Cadet Sign

    When my brother was a cadet at the U.S. Air Force Academy, there was an overhead walkway…
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    Fish Heads

    A customer at Green's Gourmet Grocery marveled at the proprietor's quick wit and…
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    A Captain's Tale

    Long ago lived a seaman named Captain Bravo. He was a manly-man who showed no fear in…
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    Politcal Quotes

    "I resent your insinuendoes." "If we don't make some changes, the status quo will remain…
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    Positive Start

    How to start your day with a positive outlook.1. Open a new file in your PC.2. Name it…
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    Open Microphone

    While my son was on the Navy carrier USS George Washington, the air wing was busy with…
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    49 Cards

    A friend of ours waited until the last minute to send Christmas cards. She knew she had…
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    All You Can Drink

    There was a business man driving down this country road when he spotted a little boy that…
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    Toucan Yell

    Driving along an outback road in Australia, I spied an exotic bird flying overhead. The…
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    Dead Faint

    The man passed out in a dead faint as he came out of his front door onto the porch.…

A young private sought permission from his Commanding Officer to leave camp the following weekend. "You see," he explained, "my wife is expecting."

"Oh..." said the Officer, "I understand. Go ahead and tell your wife that I wish her luck."

The following week the same soldier was back again with the same explanation: "My wife's expecting."

The Officer looked surprised. "Still expecting?" he said, "Well, well, my boy, you must be pretty bothered. Of course you can have the weekend off.

"When the same soldier appeared again the third week, however, the Officer lost his temper. "Don't tell me your wife is still expecting!" he bellowed.

"Yes sir!" said the soldier resolutely, "She`s still expecting." "What on earth is she expecting?" cried the Officer.

"Me." said the soldier simply.

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