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    Newbie Preacher

    A newly appointed young preacher was contacted by the local funeral director to hold a…
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    Suggestion Box

    The strict and unsmiling manager noticed that the suggestion box was missing from the…
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    The Mayor's Burden

    One of the burdens of office of the small town mayor was his brother in-law, a fellow who…
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    Rattlesnake Ammo

    An infantry brigade was training in the summer heat, learning methods to counter…
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    Proud Grandmother

    An elderly, wealthy woman in Florida was boring fellow beachcombers as she bragged on and…
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    Major League Snacks

    I took my son to his first Major League baseball game when he was four. The game was…
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    Sisters at the Superbowl

    Two elderly sisters donated $25 to a charity and, to their surprise, won tickets to the…
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    Caddy Advice

    Standing on the tee of a relatively long par three, a confident golfer said to his caddy,…
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    Do You Understand?

    At one point during a game, the coach said to one of his young players, "Do you…
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    Farming Dream

    The school of agriculture's dean of admissions was inter-viewing a prospective student,…
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    Spin the Bottle

    "We used to play spin the bottle when I was a kid. A girl would spin the bottle and if it…
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    Hybrid Car

    My uncle in Detroit tried to make a new kind of car. He took the engine from a Ford, the…
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    Even More Musings

    1. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. 2. One nice thing about egotists: They…
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    Season Ticket Swap

    Sarah was reading a newspaper, while her husband was engrossed in a magazine. Suddenly,…
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    Preacher's Donkey

    A man bought a donkey from a preacher. The preacher told the man that this donkey had…
Eye-examination charts vary according to the manufacturer, but one thing they have in common is that they don't spell anything.

One day a patient came into my office for an ophthalmological exam.  I asked him to read the 20/40 line of the eye chart, but obviously the letters FZBDE were mostly a blur to him.  Finally he ventured a guess.

"I can't pronounce his name," the man said, "but I think he played football for Notre Dame."
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