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More Jokes

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    Help Line

    It's clear why these people needed to call a "help" line.------Customer: "I've been…
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    If Dr. Seuss Wrote for Star Trek: The Next Generation

    Picard: Sigma Indri, that's the star,So, Data, please, how far? How far? Data: Our ship…
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    Card Reader

    "Can people predict the future with cards?" Jessica asked Danny."My mother can," Danny…
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    50 Years - 5 Minutes

    On an airplane, I overheard a stewardess talking to an elderly couple in front of…
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    Learned From a Snowman

    "All I Need to Know about Life I Learned From a Snowman.... " --It's okay if you're a…
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    The Beginning

    When the new patient was settled comfortably on the couch, the psychiatrist began his…
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    Cover All Exits!

    During a bank robbery the police chief told the sergeant to cover all exits so the…
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    Wimpy Dad

    One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her small boy into…
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    Awareness Test

    Two paramedics were dispatched to check on a 92-year-old man who had become disoriented.…
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    Pie Manners

    In a country home that seldom had guests, the young son was eager to help his mother…
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    Back Seat Johnny

    A woman was driving her old beat up car on the highway with her 7 yr. old son, Little…
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    Cops and Robbers

    Esther Cohen had three very active boys. One summer evening she was playing cops and…
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    Fishing and Sisters

    A boy was taking care of his baby sister while his parents went to town shopping. He…
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    Gardening Help

    An old man living alone in South Armagh, whose only son was in Long Kesh Prison, didn't…
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    Grasshopper in Bar

    A grasshopper goes into a bar and hops on to a barstool to order a drink. The bartender…

speech bubble*Famous Last Words*

*Ha! They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist...

*Don't unplug it, it will just take a moment to fix.

*What happens if you touch these two wires tog-

*We won't need reservations.

*It's always sunny there this time of the year.

*Gimmee a match. I think my gas tank is empty.

*Step on her, boy, we're only going 75.

*If you knew anything, you wouldn't be a traffic cop.

*What? Your mother is going to stay another month?

*Say, who's boss of this joint, anyhow?

"Luke, I lied. Bill Shatner is your real father." - Darth Vader

"Don't worry about the Rover. That's no cliff." - NASA techie

*They'd never make him a manager.

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