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    Goobers With Shovels

    There were two guys working for the city. One would did a hole, he would dig, dig, dig,…
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    The Day Before

    Showing his friend around his home, Fred started to point out all of the collectibles his…
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    Little Encouragement

    The minister was shaking everyone's hand while they were leaving the church. An elderly…
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    10 Easy Ways To Say No

    I'd love to, but...1 I have to floss my cat.2 I've dedicated my life to linguini.3 I want…
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    Military Computer

    Officers at a military installation were being lectured about a new computer. The…
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    Four Waiting Fathers

    Four expectant fathers were in a Minnesota hospital waiting room while their wives were…
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    Bubba's Friends

    Bubba was bragging to his boss one day, "You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just…
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    Things Not To Say or Do at a Job Interview

    ** See photo of interviewer's family on desk, point, start laughing uncontrollably.** Ask…
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    Suggestion Box

    The strict and unsmiling manager noticed that the suggestion box was missing from the…
  • dog scotty

    Guard Dog Karate

    A young couple lived in a town filled with crime. After three neighbors had been robbed,…
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    Boat Compromise

    My friend wanted a boat more than anything. His wife kept refusing, but he bought one…
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    Thanks, Honey

    A man who is driving a car is stopped by a police officer. The following exchange takes…
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    Reward Change

    A lady lost her handbag at the mall. An honest young lad found it and returned it to her.…
  • birthday2

    Jury Age

    Just as she was celebrating her 80th birthday, our friend received a jury-duty notice.…
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    Family Problems

    Two men met at a bus stop and struck up a conversation. One of them kept complaining of…

A first grade teacher collected old, well known proverbs.  She gave each kid in her class the first half of a proverb, and had them come up with the rest.

As You Shall Make Your Bed So Shall You...  Mess It Up.

Better Be Safe Than...  Punch A 5th Grader.

Strike While The...  Bug Is Close.

It's Always Darkest Before...  Daylight Savings Time.

Never Under Estimate The Power Of...  Termites.

You Can Lead A Horse To Water But..  How?

Don't Bite The Hand That...  Looks Dirty.

No News Is...  Impossible.

A Miss Is As Good As A...  Mr.

You Can't Teach An Old Dog New...  Math.

If You Lie Down With The Dogs, You'll...  Stink In The Morning.

Love All, Trust..  Me The Pen Is Mightier Than The...  Pigs.

An Idle Mind Is...  The Best Way To Relax.

Where There's Smoke, There's...  Pollution.

Happy The Bride Who...  Gets All The Presents!

A Penny Saved Is...  Not Much.

Two's Company, Three's...  The Musketeers.

Don't Put Off Tomorrow What...  You Put On To Go To Bed.

Laugh And The Whole World Laughs With You, Cry And...  You Have To Blow Your Nose.

None Are So Blind As...  Helen Keller.

Children Should Be Seen And Not...  Spanked Or Grounded.

If At First You Don't Succeed...  Get New Batteries.

You Get Out Of Something What You...  See Pictured On The Box.

When The Blind Leadeth The Blind...  Get Out Of The Way.

There Is No Fool Like...  Aunt Eddie.

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