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More Jokes

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    New Discovery

    The scene: Alexander Graham Bell's laboratory.An exciting new discovery is about to take…
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    Cancelling Cards

    Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you die. This is so priceless, and so easy to…
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    The Haircut

    A young man had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was a minister,…
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    Bridge Over Troubled Waters

    There were two old geezers living in the backwoods of the Ozarks: Rufus and Clarence.…
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    Forgive Your Enemies

    The preacher, in his Sunday sermon, used "Forgive Your Enemies" as his subject. After a…
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    Collateral

    I accompanied my husband when he went to get a haircut. Reading a magazine, I found a…
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    Ash Request

    A businessman on his deathbed called his friend and said, "Bill, I want you to promise me…
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    Dish Shopping

    When visiting her family in Los Angeles, a woman decided to explore a trendy shopping…
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    More Bumper Stickers

    * FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION! It comes bundled with the software. * I can't dial 911.…
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    Let Me Feel Your Pain

    It can buy a house but not a home. It can buy a bed, but not sleep. It can buy a clock…
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    4 Year Ceiling

    A young woman, pursuing a graduate degree in art history, was going to Italy to study the…
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    Living to 104

    At his 103rd birthday party, my grandfather was asked if he planned to be around for his…
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    One Per Point

    One day a professor was giving a big test to his students. He handed out all of the tests…
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    Clothes Hamper

    I asked my two-year-old to take his dirty clothes and put them into the hamper.He looked…
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    Because I Am A Guy

    Because I am A Guy... ..I must hold the television remote control in my hand while I…

Elmer says, "First, I got tonsillitis, followed by appendicitis and pneumonia. After that I got erysipelas with hemachromatosis. Following that I got poliomyelitis and finally ended up with neuritis. Then they gave me hypodermics and inoculations."

Calvin says, "Boy, you had quite a time!"

Elmer replies, "I'll say! I thought I'd never pull through that spelling test."

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