More Jokes

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    ATM Correction

    My father began teaching business classes at the local prison through a community…
  • store sign

    Good Robbery

    The detective was interviewing the man whose clothing shop had just been burglarized.…
  • showerhead

    Too Distant / Too Close

    The showers in my daughter's dorm turned scalding hot whenever a toilet was flushed. To…
  • bill couple

    After Me

    "I have to have a raise," the man said to his boss. "Three companies are after me." "Is…
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    Proper Attire

    Proper attire is required in the cafeteria at the University of Maine. To enforce that…
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    Nervous Bride

    Apparently this is a true story. A woman in her forties got married but was bit nervous…
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    Traffice Warning

    As he was driving home from work, a man in a rural community was stopped by a local…
  • A funny diatribe about children and parenting

    Lamentation For Our Kids

    This is rather lengthy but funny. *Laws Pertaining to Dessert* For we judge between the…
  • A list of 17 points to ponder about life.

    Stuff to Ponder

    1. Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you? But when you…
  • newspaper

    From British Newspapers

    1) Commenting on a complaint from a Mr. Arthur Purdey about a large gas bill, a spokesman…
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    House Points

    "This house," said the real estate salesman, "has both its good points and its bad…
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    Progressive Motherhood

    Yes, parenthood changes everything. But parenthood also changes with each baby. Here,…
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    Homework Problem

    One of my third-graders came to school crying. "Jonathan's upset because he couldn't…
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    Small Town Check

    I had just moved from an apartment to a house in the same small town. One day at the…
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    Actual Signs

    Bucharest Hotel Lobby - "The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time you…

A man goes skydiving for the first time.

After listening to the instructor for what seems like days, he is ready to go.  Excited, he jumps out of the plane.  After a bit, he pulls the ripcord.

Nothing happens. 

He tries again.  Still nothing.  He starts to panic, but remembers his back-up chute.  He pulls that cord.  Nothing happens.  He frantically begins pulling both cords, but to no avail.

Suddenly, he looks down and he can't believe his eyes.  Another man is in the air with him, but this guy is going *up*!  Just as the other guy passes by, the skydiver -- by this time scared out of his wits -- yells, "Hey, do you know anything about skydiving?"

The other guy yells back, "No!  Do you know anything about gas stoves?"

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