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More Jokes

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    Classmate Reunion

    While waiting for my first appointment in the reception room of a new dentist, I noticed…
  • computer keyboard

    Computer Dating

    A hopeful suitor dropped into a computer-dating center and registered his qualifications.…
  • Last Minute Turkey

    Last Minute Turkey

    It's the day before Thanksgiving and the butcher is just locking up when a man pounds on…
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    Airport Mistletoe

    It was the beginning of December. The trip had gone reasonably well, and he was ready to…
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    Returned E-mail

    The start of the new school term always brings out the most interesting questions for…
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    Church Mice Problem

    Three pastors were having lunch together at a diner. The first pastor said, "Ya know,…
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    Deacon's Minutes

    The newly elected secretary for the Deacon Board at church submitted this report:October…
  • A funny conversation between brothers.

    Silly Mom

    Thanks to list member Lowell Guebert for sending in this real life, happened to her,…
  • barber pole

    Duelling Barbers

    A new hair salon opened up for business right across the street from the old established…
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    Yes, We Have No Chocolate

    A man goes into an ice cream parlor and says, "I'd like two scoops of chocolate ice…
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    Busy Mom

    My busy mother sometimes accidentally left pots and pans on the stove with the burners…
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    Boring Flight

    Bored during a long flight, an eminent scholar leaned over and woke up the sleeping man…
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    Watch Your Hat and Overcoat

    The crowded cafeteria sported a large sign reading: "Watch Your Hat and Overcoat."Meyer…
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    Kids and Cliches

    I teach fourth grade in Ventura County, California. As a fun assignment, I gave the…
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    Big Toe Tingle

    A young man, fresh out of college, went to see his doctor one day. "Doc, there's…

Now that I'm older....here's what I've discovered:

  • I STARTED out with nothing....I still have most of it.
  • When did my wild oats turn to prunes and All Bran?
  • I finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart.
  • Funny, I don't remember being absent minded.
  • All reports are in.  Life is now officially unfair.
  • If all is not lost, where is it?
  • It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
  • The first rule of holes: If you are in one, stop digging.
  • I went to school to become a wit, only got half-way through..
  • It was all so different before everything changed.
  • Some days you're the dog, some days you're the hydrant.
  • Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
  • I wish the buck stopped here.  I could use a few...
  • It's not the pace of life that concerns me, it's the sudden stop at the end.
  • It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.
  • The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the bathroom.
  • If God wanted me to touch my toes, He would have put them on my knees.
  • When you're finally holding all the cards, why does everyone else decide to play chess?
  • Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
  • It's not hard to meet expenses...  they're everywhere.
  • The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
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